Ceasing contact

I sent a letter to my ex to try and get something official on paper in place for my daughters childcare arrangemtns between us.

in the letter it states his failure to show up and his poor time keeping is causing her anxiety and is not good for her wellbeing. if it continues i will cease contact and he will need to go through the court for access.

Today has been a horrible battle of text messages, seeminly trying ot manipulate what have been said in the letter about contact; along the lines of..

'as of XYZ date, you are no longer allowing me to see my daughter this is due to the fact that im inconsistent with my times picking her up and its causing her anxiety problems too'

I feel he has totally twisted everything here.

The letter merely stated how his actions are impacing her and if he contiunes the way he is it will cause damaneg to her. shes only 8.

Im so lost here, i have no idea what to do or say anymore. i feel bullied by his demands and text messages. my solicitor is very expensive.

Now i cannot deal with this, its causing ME stress and anxiety.

I really need some help here.

Thanks

Hi Whippert,

Sorry you're feeling overwhelmed and I know how difficult it is when you're the one dealing with a distressed child. It seems you're not getting a break and that is exhausting. It's all about control and it's unfair. He is controlling you and your daughter and doesn't seem to be willing to compromise.

I'm sure Dads reading this who are desperate to stay in the lives of their children will feel exasperated with the casual attitude of your stbx.

Document everything. Every late visit/return or failure to show up. You may need to go to court to get him to see his responsibilities as a Dad. You need to have evidence to explain the effect this is having on you and on your daughter. I presume he has parental rights as you were married.

Have you considered counselling for yourself as you seem to be at the end of your tether? Talking the issues over may help. Chin up. We know how you feel.