first time seeing kids

hi to everyone . i am seeing my kids for the first time in two years and looking for some hints on what to do . a bit unsure . thanks to anyone that can help.

What are their ages?

one of the boys is five and one is seven i do have a girl at ten but she is not wanting to see me because of here mum

Hi

A great way to connect with the kids and give you all something to do and talk about is to take them each a magazine - I have girls so in my case it would be a Disney mag, but they do similar power rangers etc type things for boys.

They cost about £2 each, but they have games and pictures to colour ect inside, so it gives you a focus to have some natural play and chat with them, and with any luck they will give you the pictures they have done for your fridge.

Dont forget to take a box of coloured pencils!

Amanda

So is this independent contact? Are you picking them up to take them out somewhere?

2 years is a long time. Maybe you need to think of something that you can do together but is not completely in their face. Maybe a Playspace or something, this way you can interact with them but giving them their own space but you also have the chance to sit down with them and have a drink and a snack/lunch where you can have a conversation and a catch up.

I know you may be tempted to find out all about what they have been doing in the last 2 years but just concentrate on the day and maybe what they have been doing that week.

Coming up to Christmas they will have been practising for the school play and singing carols etc. Maybe they will sing a Christmas song to you that they have learnt at school.

Depending on how boyish they are, they may just prefer to kick a football about in the park.

One thing I would say is don't spend lots of money this time around (if you have it) because you want them to get to know you as a person again (not someone that provides material things every time they see you).

I really hope contact goes well for you. Try not to expect too much from them and go at their pace and what they are comfortable with.

All the best.

Sarah

thank will try that . but worried how they will be with me did have grat fun with them all before i left my xwife i know she has told them bad things about me but not sure what . so not sure how the kids will be .

Dont worry

At their ages, an adult sitting down with them and focusing wholly on doing something fun with them will soon bring them round.

Amanda