Final Hearing & Mortgage payments

Hi, hoping for some guidance. I'm in the process of Divorce and Financial Order from my soon to be ex wife.
We have done the first hearing, a FDR which the judge adjourned due to my ex and her barrister being totally unprepared. And then a rescheduled FDR which was just as pointless.
I am LIP and whilst my ex is meant to be LIP her barrister seems to be acting on her behalf on almost everything despite him being a totally useless public access barrister.

It's obvious to me that they have had one goal all along and that is to drag the process out as long as possible.

I currently pay over £1200 a month in CMS payments, whilst also paying over £1100 a month for the mortgage on the matrimonial home that my wife, my 3 children and her parents live in. I am the sole mortgage holder and everything is in my name.

I have made it abundantly clear I can not afford to do this. It's obvious from my income and outgoings this is not sustainable. But no one seems to care.

The FDR judge made it clear that my ex could not expect me to continue payments for CMS and the mortgage and gave a steer on what she should expect at a final hearing, low and behold it is less than I currently pay.

The final hearing has now been scheduled for September!!! Which obviously means my ex does not need to do anything between now and August except keep living in the house with the mortgage paid and receiving a hefty CMS payment on top of some quite decent benefit payments. Which ultimately give her a monthly income in excess of £3500 (before I pay the mortgage)
I on the other hand have no where to go and no way of changing things and literally start each month in the red whilst renting a room from a friend.

CMS don't seem interested in the fact I am paying the mortgage and CMS (although I have submitted a claim for this to be considered 3 months ago) which may reduce CMS by a hundred pound maybe.

Other than stopping paying the mortgage and going bankrupt or asking for the final hearing to be bought forwards do I have any way of getting my ex and her parents to contribute to payment of the mortgage each month between now and September as I feel that if she was legally obliged to contribute she might actually consider the settlement the FDR judge proposed as opposed to drag this out as long as possible at my expense.

I've tried an occupation order but that was rejected based on the fact I'd not raised it when my ex tried to get (and failed) a non mol against me. So they see it as inappropriate use of the courts time.

Surely there must be some way they should contribute to the payments of the mortgage when they live in the house and refuse to allow me to live in the house yet I am solely responsible for the mortgage.

Rent free living with CMS on top for almost 2 years just seems totally incomprehensible.

Many thanks in advance!


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I'm a banker, not a lawyer, but on this occasion this might be a good thing!

There are two things you should be aware of that are relevant to my industry. The first is the new Consumer Duty, specifically the duties of financial services firms to vulnerable customers. As someone going through a divorce, you are classified as a vulnerable customer and therefore we have a heightened duty to you.

The second thing is that there is a cost of living crisis and the FCA has written to all banks laying down their expectations of how we get customers through this crisis. One obvious expectation is that we let people make their mortgage more manageable.

Incidentally as a customer going through a divorce a mortgage holiday would have been quite normal at the best of times, albeit historically having some affect on your credit rating. Now though you can ask banks to 1) extend your mortgage term (it can normally end up to age 75) and 2) only pay the interest with no impact on your credit score. I suggest as a first step you do that.

The next step would be to stop paying the mortgage and informing your ex. Normally in these games of chicken, the occupant spouse buckles first. Worst case you can hold the interest only amounts in an account and clear the arrears before repossession if you have to.

I should also have added. Repossession would only bankrupt you if the sale price was not enough to settle the mortgage. Banks will sell houses cheap in repossession but if about 80% of the value is enough to cover the mortgage (and your wife is going to get most of the property anyway) then it's probably a risk worth taking.

Aside from looking at options to manage the mortgage, you could make a clear dated open offer to settle. This could work in your favour if the judge thinks she should have settled. It should be based on the indication given by the judge at FDR but should not refer directly to it.

I don't know if you could be charging occupation rent that could be deducted from CM. This is worth exploring.

Hadenoughnow