Hello, we think we have come to an arrangement but I’m questioning does this sound like a reasonable split given the info below.
Ages me 43(M), stbx 45(F)
One child age 7 lives with stbx, I have the child at mine every other weekend, I'm not involved with them very much in between.
Pensions me £15k, stbx £50k
Property equity might be about £300k. Mortgage 320k
Both have a car, me £2k, stbx £10k
Bank accounts/credit cards me about £5000 debt, stbx about £8000 in the bank, she’s managing everything, paying all the bills etc.
Businesses mine in debt by about £20k, hers with £50k in the bank she’s going to put into moving house and hopes to get a manageable mortgage.
Married 12 years, cohabited 10 years before. We kept separate finances and put percentage of bills based on number of days worked in joint account. She thought we earned the same and didn’t know how much I earned/owed until disclosure during
mediation. Or that I didn’t contribute to my pension etc. Or that my business was in debt. (my dishonesty of omission/letting her believe what I wanted the truth to be).
Income me self employed around 30-40k not likely to increase, stbx anticipates around 50-60k or less because she will be basically full time sole-parenting and trying to fit in freelance work around it. We lived near to my work, not hers as I wanted her to be home more, so I could be out more. I’m not very involved now though. She is freelance but has been working more hours to keep up with mortgage and earned about £120k last tax year and £90k tax this year. Just to keep the roof, because I don't contribute to the bills at all.
Mortgage is a lot every month because it went off fixed rate and onto variable when I moved out and I didn’t respond to her trying to contact me to get it sorted onto a fix.
I don’t contribute financially, live with my family of origin. I owe my dad for the residence, although I’m not paying him currently.
I moved out of
FMH about 6 years ago, went back sometimes until Sep 2022 stopped going back at all. stbx lives in fmh currently with child, she’s working 2 jobs to pay for it all, 12 hours+ a day, trying to fit it in when child has been put to bed.
She filed for divorce to try to keep the house from going back to the lender because she can’t keep this up for the next 20 years..
We’re going to keep own bank accounts, pensions and businesses and split house equity 35% me and 65% her because she has the child and does most of the parenting as well as trying to work.
Does this sound fair? She can’t remortgage to raise the equity to buy me out, especially with interest rates now, so house will have to be sold to pay me off my 35% and she will try and buy somewhere else, hoping to not have to relocate the child/school etc but maybe they have to relocate because we are in the south and she won’t be able to work and parent and afford mortgage by herself. Maybe she can move closer to her work, otherwise she can only take contracts which are working from home (not as many now)
Does this sound a fair split?
