Types of Custody

I wanted to have shared responsibity for my two kids. I made all the nessesary arrangements through work regarding flexi hours etc , the kids thought it a fab idea , I even had it all written down to present during mediation.

But no ,,, she would,nt agree to it because she,ll lose the 20% of my wages she gets every month. But I protested , you wont need it, as all child costs will be split. But no budging her. I have them stay 3 nights per week most weeks anyway , so why not 3 nights every week.

Dont get me wrong I did,nt want this for financial reasons (like some) I wanted SR because I love my kids & still want to play a big part in thier lives , plus I love havin them round to stay.

Sometimes however hard it is you just have to shut up & put up as if i really pursued this it,ll only cause rows that,ll affect the kids. IMHO provisions for children in this country needs a hefty boot up the backside. In the ideal world SR should be granted straightaway & then negotiated from there. Obviously in some cases (DV etc) this cant be , but in most divorces surely this would,nt be a problem.

Rant over , lol

Dobbs.

Hi All,

i'll be getting shared residency when we finally divorce & sell the MH, 3 days & nights per week. Its the best way forward if you will be living fairly close.

Most Women don't like the idea as in divorce we all know they like to come out with everything (house, children, new man, tax credits, pension & maintenance)Its little wonder that 20% of fathers lose all contact with their children after divorce. Of course all the blame is then heaped on the abscent fathers when their children become criminals, even though their ex wife has been too busy working their way through any men who tell them how great they look & getting their breasts enlarged.

Children need good dads, i will never let mine down.

Well said

I would be interested to know what the statistics are on the following:

1) CSA/voluntary non paying dads who were married fathers?
2)CSA/voluntary non paying dads who were casual partners/short term boyfriends?

I just dont buy it that loads of fathers who have married and lived with their wives many years and raised children with them just then bugger off and dont pay.

I would think that most men that have committed to marriage either before of after the kids came along dont just turn their back on the kids thet have rasied for years.

I think the bad press about non paying fathers is probably more likely to be fathers in boat 2 than boat 1.

I know at least 8 men quite well within my social/family circle who are divorced and are certainly not non paying dads. Come to think of it, I dont even know of 1 dad that is a non payer.

I have an ex who too, has had breast enlargements since we split as a "gift" from the new b/f, along with 2 foreign holidays a year (without the kids in tow) despite not being able to afford to "live".

She too takes part in his motorcycle rallies most weekends and attends certain music venues around the country following the new b/f in the evenings, alongside riding round with friends on the bikes.

This must be the reason why she needs an 87% split of the assets, and does not have any regular contact with her son.

Oh and lets not forget that in between having a sunbed and having her hair done and having her nails done and clothes shopping she actually manages to get herself to work (part time only of course, as she is suffering with depression as a result of the divorce and couldnt possibly work more hours than that).

If my son were unfortunate enough to turn out a criminal in adulthood would anyone tar my wife with the same brush as they do the dads for not being there whilst growing up?

Hi Fiona, i'm glad your divorce didn't affect your childrens education, however although you won't admit it, there is a good chance that your children have been affected psycologically in some way. You don't sound like you have come from a humble background though, many divorces make no financial sense & the childrens standard of living is affected.

I know of 2 women who divorced their husbands, both had new breasts out of their settlement. On both occassions the wives were having affairs with people from their work. The affairs ended shortly after the divorce, probably realised that grass is not greener. One of the girls kids has become a bad sort & has been suspended from school on 2 occassions.

What i'm saying is that wether you agree or not, women are increasingly using divorce for short term money gains, the days when people worked at marriages have gone, young women want to look younger, they want to buy new clothes every week & they want to swap men when it suits them. Look at the retail boom in the highstreet it says it all. Theres to many thick people out there who eat ready meals & watch Eastenders & coranation Street, which are full of affairs galore. Its not real life but these type of programs brainwash many.