Help please. FDR November 2023

****Anyone reading this, Please see my court outcome Post on 24 March 2025"

Getting fed up and stressed.

I applied for No fault divorce in July 2022, Wife put a stay on Final Divorce Order paper coming out until finances are resolved. Wife does not want me to get the final divorce order in case I move on in my life, she want to punish me. Constantly trying to stall divorce and finances now, I submitted Form A to court after wife failed mediation. She also failed to submit Form A to court so i done it in June 2023. wife failed to exchange Form e before FDA September, she turned up in FDA court without exchange, judge told solicitor and ex wife to be to exchange with me, and finally exchanged in October 2023. FDR in November 2023 i think 🤔.

I am litigant in Person, Wife has solicitor.

I have my FDR in November 2023 can people tell me what is fair "What is fair".

20 Years marriage

We all live in London, i work in London. Kids school, college in London

H age 42, W age 42

3 Children, aged 17 years old (attends college), 11 years old (secondary school), 8 years old (primary school). Children live with mother permanently, no child arrangement order done by me yet.

I paid £70,000 to refurbish matrimonial home in 2017 (have all evidence), since ex wife moved out 2021, I have been paying mortgage to a total of £22,000 to todays date. Will I be able to get this money back???

On Form E: H want to sell matrimonial home and share proceeds of sale with W. W wants matrimonial home in her sole name (impossible as mortgage is in H sole name and mortgage company said they will not transfer mortgage in W name without affordably and she will not get it due universal credit, outstanding mortgage left £230,000. W also wants Pension sharing.

H lives in 3 bed matrimonial home and paying mortgage, property in H sole name. W is in 3 bed Temporary council accommodation house, council pays her rent and council tax. Wife in future will get a permeant 3 bed council property.


H gross annual income Gross £27,000 (40 hours per week)
W gross annual income £877 carer job (works only 5 hours per week + Universal credit £ 14,674 + child benefit £2,106, Total= £17,657 (NO TAX or national insurance).

H currently pay child maintenance of £6,398.40 per annum to W


H
matrimonial home in London £216,163
Jewellery £0
Pension £86,242
Buy to Let in Birmingham, equity after sales cost and capital gains: £23,075
Car: £3,500
Total £325,480

Liabilities £10,823 (credit cards, have evidence)

W
Matrimonial Home £0
Jewellery £0 (She has Indian gold I gave to her but I will not mention this, worth today approximately £10,000
Car £0
Pension £0
Total £0

Liabilities £3,700 (she apparently borrowed from family, she has no evidence)

This is a long marriage with children whose needs are a priority.
If you have only just exchanged Forms E I imagine the upcoming hearing is FDA. This is a largely administrative hearing based on ensuring there is full financial disclosure and needs have been assessed. If you do have full financial disclosure I would suggest you invest in a fixed price legal financial consultation ( available via this site) to get legal advice on what a fair settlement could look like
You mention a BTL property. Could this provide a suitable home rather than being sold?
You will need to address needs in any proposal you put forward to settle this.

Hadenoughnow

Thanks.

Hello, I seem to read many posts about final hearings relating to the children. There are very few reviews about finances.

Was wondering whether you were able to provide an update please?

Unfortunately very few people come back after everything is finalised to post details of their outcome.

Hi
Sorry about not posting back, had to sell my house etc.

I was litigant in person, one advice I would say is take someone at the FDR with you, your friend, MckenzieFriend, or a Barrister. You need to get permission from court to take a friend and Mckenzie Friend.

The negations with ex-wife barrister was done in a room, then kept going back in front of judge. Barrister wanted to take everything from me, this is just a tactic to scare the other person, barrister ticked all boxes, spousal maintence, etc...,

Court Outcome which i agreed was matrimonial home should be sold and:
67% to ex-wife and 33% to Me,
50% of my pension ex wife got,
i keep the buy to let property. (Barrister used tactic and wanted to take that, Judge said "NO"

At FDR judge said ex-wife should get overall of total assets etc 55% and i should get 45%, after going back and forth, i agreed with 57% to ex, and me 43%.

Exwife is on universal credit, living in council house, free rent, council tax, etc.

Tips for court:
You are allowed to take a laptop
Stay Firm and strong in Court
take a friend, McKenzie Friend, Barrister
Best option, Finish everything at FDR, final hearing you could be at risk.

Hi
Sorry about not posting back, had to sell my house etc.

I was litigant in person, one advice I would say is take someone at the FDR with you, your friend, MckenzieFriend, or a Barrister. You need to get permission from court to take a friend and Mckenzie Friend.

The negations with ex-wife barrister was done in a room, then kept going back in front of judge. Barrister wanted to take everything from me, this is just a tactic to scare the other person, barrister ticked all boxes, spousal maintence, etc...,

Court Outcome which i agreed was matrimonial home should be sold and:
67% to ex-wife and 33% to Me,
50% of my pension ex wife got,
i keep the buy to let property. (Barrister used tactic and wanted to take that, Judge said "NO"

At FDR judge said ex-wife should get overall of total assets etc 55% and i should get 45%, after going back and forth, i agreed with 57% to ex, and me 43%.

Exwife is on universal credit, living in council house, free rent, council tax, etc.

Tips for court:
You are allowed to take a laptop
Stay Firm and strong in Court
take a friend, McKenzie Friend, Barrister
Best option, Finish everything at FDR, final hearing you could be at risk.