Out of control

I feel as if I''m spiraling out of control with regards to finances and I can''t get a hold on things.
I have a decent job and should be able to manage everything with a scrape but when the extras come up like repairs, school trips, outings, going out etc.. my spending is well over what I can afford.
i live in the FMH with our 2 children, my stbx pays nothing towards it even though it is in joint names, he pays nothing except CSA which I know is all he is legally obliged to pay. I want to sell the house but he won''t discuss finances and I can''t afford to take him to court.
Currently I have a £7500 loan and £2000 on credit cards, I had none of these before he left.
Any ideas how I can cut back or deal with the situation?

Hi gsn, just getting used to budgeting on my own as well. Easier for me as i don''t have kids and all the outgoings they generate!
I changed my elec tariff to a online pay monthly account with bg. Its saved me quite a bit. Also with food etc i take out cash each month to cover the cost, cash is good. Once its gone its gone and i can''t overspread!
Not been ''out'' for ages as i find a night out costs at least £50!
So far not had to touch the credit card..

Money Saving Expert has a excel spreadsheet that will help with budgeting.

You need to sit down and work out exactly where you money is going. It might help to write down everything for a month or two. I did this a while ago and was actually surprised to find out just where the money was going.

If you can remember/have records it would then be worth noting down how much the extraordinary expenses come to over the year - car tax, school trips, repairs. Don''t forget to budget for holidays/days out/entertainment/presents for birthdays and Christmas. You then need to make sure you build that amount up over the year.

All so easily said and so much harder to do ...

Go to your local Citizens Advice Bureau, they have trained experts, who will help you sort your debt, so that it is managable to you.

They can even write letters to the people you owe money to, and come up with a payment plan. To be honest they seem to take more notice from, letters from them, rather than from you.

I agree with lying cheat make an appointment with CAB.. I used to work with them & they are brilliant they will help you out. Make sure you have a list of all the bills debts credit card debts bank statements etc with you & will save time.

You will be sorted & its gd iyou have permanent work.

Good luck.

Thanks for all your replies. I think its just a big shock to the system still managing the same outgoings with half of the income.
Suddenly realised how easy it could be to get into a lot of debt really quickly.
Just need to stop spending and get finances sorted, if only my stbx would discuss things and stop pretending this is some sort of a game. I realised no one wins- we have all lost what we had already, no amount of money can compensate for the family unit which I thought we had, sooner i move on the better.
Its great to know there''s always someone on here to support you.