Proving Cohabitation

I moved out of the FMH in February and my ex moved in her new boyfriend in June. They have been living together 7 nights a week ever since in a stable relationship; holidays with my kids etc.He is wealthy and not contributing anything directly to bills etc. I''m paying child and some spousal maintenance. Separation was agreed mutually back in Feb.

I''ve heard different views on proving cohabitation during divorce including differing judicial opinions and best ways to prove it

Any advice greatly appreciated.

Many Thanks

It''s a difficult one and I think you''ll struggle to prove it -
I tried I had loads of expert and independant evidence - photos aswell - at the end of the day it''s down to the judges /courts decision .
In my case it was deemed that in the probability of all the evidence submitted there was cohabitation but was told it didn''t matter!
Have you got a Consent Order which says that spousal maintenance is paid until cohabitation? CM as far as I''m aware is to be paid until the child ceases full time education - but spousal maintenance would depend on the circumstances and what the order says. Unless of course it''s a voluntary arrangement - it''s very difficult to comment without more information - are you struggling to pay what was arranged? If there was a court order drawn up you would have to apply for a variation for SM - if it was voluntary can you talk to your ex to discuss the matter? and try to get it reduced?

Report her to the council tax state his name and let them suspend her benefits if she received a single person reduction

It''s very hard to prove unless you get statement from private detectives which need to observe frie days maybe weeks but not in bank holidays a judge would finf it reasonable they spend high days n holiday together the council have no such attitude

My ex moved into the OW house stating he was only there because of need and co- habitation didn''t make any difference to the financials despite his disclosure showing he wasnt contributing to either bills at her house or ours or paying anything towards our children. It just really upset me and made me act irrationally.

I think the best way forward is to just state once that she is in a stable relationship with another party living in the FMH and do your best to achieve an offer which affords you a Clean Break.

I''m only at the first stage of initiating divorce and all financial arrangements so far have been voluntary. There is a memorandum of understanding in place around separation however no consent order yet as the divorce process is only kicking off. I am stuggling to pay her £1200 per month in CM and SM and live myself.This other guy lives in the house and she claims that she is unsure about him and accordingly doesnt want him contributing to bills etc. She signed herself off her job indefinitely this week on stress and the next day she went on holidays withher new man - which he paid for. Im now expecting a claim for more money each month.

It appears that the whole system is stacked in favour of the woman who wants to ''play games'' in a divorce case. My experience so far is that the legal system wil always fall down on the side of the woman with kids. I have always been fair with her - when we seperated she got to keep all of our joint savings,everything in the house, the house itself, moved her new boyfriend in etc. I walked away with nothing bar a % of my income.

If you have time read Santos v Santos, case law, it''s the rule of thumb with cohabitation.

I understand you''re paying as you said £1200 in total every month for SM and CM - but as far as I''m aware the CM has to be paid - so it would be the amount of SM you are paying which is the problem ?
I can totally understand your grievance about paying it - as it''s a voluntary payment you are setting yourself a precident for paying it for the future. If speaking to her isn''t an option could you write to her or her solicitor to explain you can''t keep paying this amount and you will be reducing it?
As I''ve said before proving cohabitation is a problem - I had investigators reports over a 3 month period - all the criteria on cohabiting was relevant and admitted to but the judge still deemed it was irrelevant.
It doesn''t always stack in favour of the women with kids - my ex was a high wage earner could pay for the best legal team so ended up with the house , possessions and everything. I got the kids and rent now - at the end of the day I have discovered it''s down to the judges decision and their opinion.
If she demands more money and it''s voluntary say no - that''s if you can''t afford it - I presume the CM aspect of the £1200 is in line with the amount you should be paying?
If you really are struggling and there isn''t a consent order drawn up try and get the amount of SM reduced - did you agree how much was CM and SM ? Or how was the figure worked out? Usually when working out SM payments it''s the amount you can afford to pay after all your living cost and CM payments have been made - if the SM is not affordable after this then look at trying to get it reduced rather than wasting a lot of money on private investigators trying to prove cohabitation.