Your advice would be welcome

Can anyone help me with some practical advice? My wife and I were married for 18 months before she decided to end the relationship. We had co-habited for about eight years before that. She remained in our home with my consent until her daughter left school, I agreed to this because I had hopes of rebuilding our relationship and because I am a "nice guy". That was five and half years ago - the daughter left school last year. My wife has done everything possible to frustrate the divorce - pretended several times to rekindle the relationship. Flew into such a temper when I first engaged a solicitor that I withdrew as I wanted to maintain a cordial relationship. She then agreed to mediation but walked out of it after ten minutes claiming I had been abusive to her during the session to the bewilderment of both myself and the mediator. She then refused to communicate with me for the best part of a year. I then started divorce proceedings again last autumn. She delayed responding to my solicitor’s letters by two months. She refused again refused to consider mediation and made a false complaint to the police that I had been harassing her by making abusive phone calls and bombarding her with texts. I now have the evidence that these claims were entirely false. I bought all the financial resources into the relationship - the house, pension acquired before we met, savings from redundancy money again acquired pre-relationship , a legacy from my mother since we were estranged, savings since we parted. She came to me with about £30,000 worth of debt, no savings and no other assets. On a business turnover of £65K she is claiming an income of around £10K. – a nonsense. She told our solicitors we were negotiating a settlement. This "negotiation" consisted of her demanding I immediately pay her £250,000 cash by giving her all of my savings plus equity release on the house and presumably borrowing to make up the considerable shortfall - a ridiculous demand. When I declined she then withdrew all co-operation and has insisted that the divorce was postponed indefinitely. We have just been granted Decree Nisi. The bills I have already run up though my own solicitor are eye-watering. Both parties' solicitors seem too keen to go to court - maximizing their income. I no longer have much faith in my own representative's abilities to broker a meaningful deal - I have already offered half the equity in the house which would enable us both to buy smaller individual properties locally but she has refused saying she wants to go to court. I understand that Ancillary Relief through the courts will cost in the region of £10-15000. This strikes me as out of all proportion. I am inclined now to dismiss my solicitor, apply for Decree Absolute when I am able to in October and apply to the court now for a financial hearing - and in all of this to represent myself as Litigant In Person. I am articulate, meticulous and have experience at presenting evidence to legal tribunals. Should I do this myself or continue to pay my solicitor and then a barrister to go to court. What is the forum's best advice? With thanks in anticipation for your help.

It is perfectly possible to represent yourself at least for the early stages of the court process. It is important though that you understand the process and can present court paperwork in a way that helps and not hinders your case. It is also important to be realistic about likely outcomes and not to waste time (and the judge`s patience) on things that aren't going to make a difference to the eventual outcome.

You can get help here and also have a look at the fixed price services we offer to support litigants in person.

Hadenoughnow