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Fat Fighters Diet with Haway

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23 Jun 09 #126090 by hawaythelads
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WEIGHT FOR IT WEIGHT FOR IT KIMMI I HAVEN@T EVEN OPENED THE DOORS YET REMEMBER I@M IN CHARGE ROUND HERE!!!!
Anyways Kimmi the who;e point of fat fighters and them scale things what you stand on is to record your weight,not that you think you've lost weight!!!!!Every fatty ever says that!Along with but I hardly eat anything it's my genes!!!NO lovey it's DE CAKE REMEMBER STAY AWAY FROM DE CAKE!!!!
Probably the amount of Vodka you're consuming affecting your memory sweetie think you'd better lay off it sweetie ;)
Anyway back to me!!!!Now most of you won't know this but fat fighters had it's first ever convention this weekend at the Scathwaite hotel in Lancaster there were hundreds of you there all wobbling about!!!(Some mob called wikisummit or other was pretending it was there function)but that was just a load of rubbish it was all fat fighters!!!
Now that comes to our talking point this week how do yougo to a function and stick to your diet????
Well I'll tell you because I managed it perfectly!
First thing is drink as much as you want,it's just rude not to!!!
Got there on the Friday and had to have a pint with gaza and handle and luckyfist and then they had to buy me one back so that was six in the first two hours then saffy turned up so that was obligatory to drink and then the lovely tets and mish bought me another so it would've been rude not to reciprocate.Oh and Fools and Angel had to bec sociable with them tooo!!!!!
And then we went back to the apartment for dinner at 11 p.m coz everyone knows that food is best digested at midnight!
And then we carried on drinking until 5.15 a.m in the morning until security told us to turn it in.
Saturday we all enjoyed a lovely breakfast of bacon sausage eggs toast beans and black pudding so this is really what I call the Fat fighters Atkins option so there's nothing wrong with that.But the key really is to let Handleman cook it because he takes so long top cook it that in the end you really are only eating lumps of charcoal which is a very close relative to dust and as we all know Dust has no calories!!!
Then late afternoon after Handle had finally served up breakfast take some exercise.I had a really hard workout sitting in the jacuzzi.Really took it out of me my skin was like a prune when I got out!!!.
Then on Saturday night we had the Fat fighters party again being the group leader this involved lots and lots and lots of drinking as I am so poular i couldn't get to the bar without someone else buying me a pint.
The hotelier Mike set a test which all you fatties failed dismally by munching down curry with lancashire hotpot and they'll be hannibal masks being sold for 310 each to all offenders.



Anyway luckily we had the rocking pensioner Ironside spinning his 78's on his gramophone and we all burnt off some excess calories to George Formby and when I'm cleaning Windows.
Then It was carriages at 3 and we continued drinking until 6 a.m
Now contrary to what Rosemary might preach about that being a bit excessive Fat fighters has yet again proven that Marjorie knows far more about dieting than she ever will.
The trick is if you socialise is to stay up 21 hours a day each day drinking because in the extra 5 hours your awake when any other non alcoholic would be asleep you burn another extra 25% of your calories.Thus counterracting the calories in the booze.
Also go to a function with Saffy because you spend so much time running away from her talking non stop at you that this burns more calories then Roger Bannister running a four minute mile.
So i hope you all appreciate now how to socialise but still keep to your diet!!
Once again Thank you all for attending the Fat Fighters ball ;)xx

WEEK 3 16 stone 13 lbs thats two pounds lost!!!!!

And that is the biggest fecking miracle since that star shone in Bethlehem over the manger!!!!!



Marjorie Dawes aka HRH Group leader xx
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23 Jun 09 #126201 by saffron1968
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Lol......Hmmmmmm!!!!! I was banned most of the time from the kitchen because when you guys were cooking breakfast it was a Saffy free zone!!!! Good weight loss idea, lost loads....and yes talking does burn those calories and so does singing also and holding a glass xxx

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29 Jun 09 #127693 by Handleman
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Get your own gourmet brekkie next time lol
:woohoo:

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29 Jun 09 #127696 by saffron1968
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HUH!!!! Im lost for words x

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02 Jul 09 #128261 by hawaythelads
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WHO ATE ALL THE PIES................... ME!!!!!
Week 4 17 st 2 lbs that's 3 lb gain OH THE SHAME!!!!!

It's not my fault!!!It's genetical.I have a genetical disposition to stuff my face full of food and drink!!!
Never mind fellow fatfighters this weeks talk will be about bouncing back!!And believe me I've got a big enuff rse to bounce back on!!!;)
Sometimes in a diet we reach what is technically known as a plateau.In my case I reached the plateau and then went on to scale the North face of the Eiger!
But Fatfighters plan has a one week diet plan to get you back on track.This plan is so effective that we call it FATFASTTRACK.
As this diet has needed extensive research to develop it we chgarge £35 a week for the food supplements but the weight Loss results are incredible.
You send me Marjorie Dawes a cheque made out in my name or better still cash and FATFIGHTERS send back your food supplements these are not DUST its LOW CALORIE DUST SACHETS so low calorie they are in fact empty DUST sachets.
MIX the low calorie DUST with water for one week and you'll be right back on track thats the FAST FAT TRACK program.
Right now where's that Ben and Jerry's Chunky Spunky monkey Ice cream all this typing in this heat i need some cooling down.
Good Luck Fatties.
Marjorie Dawes aka HRH
xxxx
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02 Jul 09 #128302 by Kimmi
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I feel quite smug then that I've lost a pound. ha ha ha

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02 Jul 09 #128323 by saffron1968
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I think that reading this post burns a lot of calories because it makes me scream with laughter and as we know laughing does burn those calories.....had a lovely swim last night is the sea and the water was gorgeous and so warm. As a treat because I had been swimming, laughing talking ect. I had fish and chips!!! :lol:Thanks Haway, the diet is fantastic, cant wait for the next meeting. :laugh::laugh::laugh:

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