Hi - urgently need advice

Hi broken, I can appreciate why you're feeling worried for the children and extremely hurt to be put in this position.

I have some experience in schools and my instinct is that as far as the school is concerned their relationship is their business, unless it affects her teaching. However, the Headteacher may have a problem if one of the children needs to be in her class in the future. It would need to go to the Governors. As it is a CofE school there may also be contractual issues for which the school will have a policy document.

I assume from your posts that on your visit to the school you discussed with the Head your concerns for the children being in the same school as their mother's lover and that you feel it may cause them some distress. He/she may decide there is a safeguarding issue and would then have to inform the Governors.

If I was in the teacher's position I would apply for a new job and at least I could then resign and not risk being sacked on a safeguarding issue, but of course she may not choose to do that and she would have legal representation.

I wish you the best possible outcome for you and the children, so they may get on with their childhood feeling secure in the love of both parents.

_broken_ wrote:

Yeah that was pretty brutal to be fair! Just bought a new home, set up a new business with my wife, promotion on the cards at work, kids doing well at school. Sounds like we were fighting in the trenches that. What more can a bloke do...

Like I say, what seems rosy on one side can often be something different on the other side. You don’t need to be at war for a person to want out. Your ex has made her choice and moved on with what she believes will make her happy.


As for the later post that this is a safeguarding issue. I’m hopeful the school is way more in tune than others at this. And hopefully more in step with what safeguarding involves. I’m fairly sure being a lesbian isn’t a safeguarding concern. Absolutely nothing has been mentioned about either child being upset at the situation but one parent has decided on their behalf to get involved even though the teacher in question doesn’t teach those children . Uncannily some teachers may actually have children at the same school and it causes no issues, this may be the case here