Fair settlement

Married 19 years.
6 children ages 4,6,8,10,12,14 and 16.
ex earned 80k last year.
my income was 1.4K self employed.
I went on if when we separated

his debts are 4K credit card, 6k personal loan for tax debt (he arguing that is matrimonial)
my debts 2k credit (was for family purchases but won’t be arguing it)
joint debt tax credit over payment 4k

assets him 3k bike, 0.5k bike, 3k car. (His formE valuation 1.5k)
pension 70k (over 18month old valuation)
my assets zero.

house valuation of 115k mortgage of 50k.
All costs being met by me for last 12 month.

Apologies. I started claiming universal credits not if.
I should state he pays child maintenance.

He has falsely argued that he is contributing to house bills. And wants house sold and wants 50% of proceeds of sale

Welcome to Wikivorce but sorry you find yourself here.

It sounds like he needs a major reality check. The priority is going to be providing secure and stable housing for the children (and by default you if you are the main carer) at least until they can be independent.

I would imagine the most cost effective way to do that is to stay in the FMH. How big is the property?

Is there any chance you would be able to take on the outstanding mortgage now or in the future? His mortgage capacity should be sufficient to take on another mortgage even if he has to stay on that one for the time being.

He will need to pay child maintenance based on his income.

The pension is small (although you do need an up to date value) and could be at least partially offset against property. It may be that a court would think you should still get half.

I think you should suggest he takes legal advice on how settlement on divorce works and you work together to make sure the children are secure.

Hadenoughnow

Tissues with the house are that he has neglected any and all maintenance (needs full electric rewire) major replumbing, etc.
so to buy a house with 4 beds to replace will cost me minimum of £180k. A like to like detached with drive way and garden I would need minimum £220k.

my first proposal was 70:30 and I offered him indemnity from mortgage payments. But I wanted his share locked in as a charge as the amount of money I need to invest in house to bring it up to habitable standards is 20k and it’s only through neglect that it’s necessary.
I gave him the choice with his pension of 50:50 or he spousal maintenance of £300 per month.
he refused and came back 60:40 split on final house valuation. 50:50 split on pension. Which was ok ish. But he said he wanted non existent payments to house bills removed from his child support payments. And claimed to also
be paying towards mortgage falsely. So I provided evidence that these were false claims. And said on the basis that he was provided false information I would be rejecting his claim.

his next offer was to say he wants 50:50 and he is referring it to mediation because I am rejecting his offer and he wants a swift resolution.

If you are claiming benefits there is no real point in getting SM as it is deducted £ for £. It sounds like refurbishing the existing property is a cheaper option than moving. I cannot see from what you have said how you would be in a position to release funds in the short term. I also cannot see how it would be possible to move to a more expensive property.

CMS assessment for CB is a statutory mimimum: it is open to him to pay more so even if he had contributed to bills it would not be seen as an extra contribution.

Getting involved in tit for tat arguments is pointless as is him having unrealistic and unreasonable expectations. It is a route thst can lead to a stressful and ruinously a expensive court process. Your priority must be the children.

Rather than paying for mediation, why not suggest he books a legal consultation? Or even just reads the guidance on financial settlement that is freely available.

Hadenoughnow

I can’t get a mortgage based on the uc. The amount of MS I requested would be acceptable in thresholds and would be classed as court income for a mortgage application. If I could get that I would happily accept to offset his share house against his pensions.

I apologise if it appeared tit tat but he was a compulsive liar and I have suffered 20 years of coercive control and emotional
Abuse at his hand. The lies I prove we’re necessary as he attempting to use to leave me and the children financially destitute.