Respondent applying for absolute advice please ?

That means she can easily string it out till your children reach 18 and/or she starts full time work and you can prove to the court that she could infact obtain the mortgage in her own name or if she cohabits then you could try and push it then (but don't bank on it then).

Untill then it would be a waste of time trying to push for a house sale as the court wouldn't make her homeless to benefit you and you've already said she won't get a mortgage as things currently stand.

T

well surely the mortgage co will want to see the arrears reduced and take it off interest only . as i am on mortgage they will need my consent in april for the mortgage to continue on interest only
and also housing benefit only pays out for max 2 years on mortgages .

if anyone has practical experience rather than guesswork that would help me in deciding whether i can go for Decree Absolute
thanks

click wrote:

well surely the mortgage co will want to see the arrears reduced and take it off interest only . as i am on mortgage they will need my consent in april for the mortgage to continue on interest only
and also housing benefit only pays out for max 2 years on mortgages .

if anyone has practical experience rather than guesswork that would help me in deciding whether i can go for decree Absolute
thanks

If by guess work you meant my comments i'm afraid it wasn't a guess. I have exactly that same clause in the court order from the final hearing and have gone through all the options already to try and be released and it means if she can't then she can't. So you're in the hands of the mortgage company to see what steps your specific mortgage company will take in april and what other arrangements they will make.

Any arrears or defaults etc on the mortgage get to apply to you as well as her credit rating and when they come looking for their money it will be to both of you not just her.

Sorry if it's not want you wanted to hear.

T

nbm1708 wrote:

click wrote:

well surely the mortgage co will want to see the arrears reduced and take it off interest only . as i am on mortgage they will need my consent in april for the mortgage to continue on interest only
and also housing benefit only pays out for max 2 years on mortgages .

if anyone has practical experience rather than guesswork that would help me in deciding whether i can go for decree Absolute
thanks

If by guess work you meant my comments i'm afraid it wasn't a guess. I have exactly that same clause in the court order from the final hearing and have gone through all the options already to try and be released and it means if she can't then she can't. So you're in the hands of the mortgage company to see what steps your specific mortgage company will take in april and what other arrangements they will make.

Any arrears or defaults etc on the mortgage get to apply to you as well as her credit rating and when they come looking for their money it will be to both of you not just her.

Sorry if it's not want you wanted to hear.

T

sure i understand T
well if they threaten repo then I'm sure she will sell and release the 200k+ equity
and rehouse comfortably
she's never going to beable to afford a mortgage on her own ( i don't have to apy any spousal main ) so she needs a windfall or a new partner who will pay the mortgage but he's going to want a slice of the equity which she's not going to give without a good few years of a relationship

but my main question was about me going for the Absolute - any advice here T ??

I did. For me the order was in place even if not yet fully complied with and i wanted to put a mental finish to that part of my life not to mention the fact that i did not want my ex tied to me as my spouse still in the grey no mans land of divorce.

At the end of the day if needs be you can always apply back to the court for enforcement and tge Absolute doesn't change that.

T

Ok thanks T
Yes i need closure - I have a total financial Clean Break so want the emotional one too
Plus I'd quite like the satsifaction

did you do it DIY ?
can you recommend a DIY guide

She's still really angry ( still blocking childrens contact , phoning my mom who has alzeimers and being abusive etc etc )

she has the divorce , a decent financial settlement - why is she denying contact with the kids when they need to see me and the court will order it ??

did you manage to quell any of your ex's anger to make it more amicable ?