Can anyone help.please.
On Wednesaday evening, I had gone for a little walk, on return to my house via the public foot path, found my stbx parked in his car behind the house. Knocked on the window, he wound it down he was visibly shocked to see me. I saw OW Sitting in passenger seat. I asked why he was parked there. He said he wanted to talk to me. Anyway too long winded to go into, and history of him right from day one of him leaving for her , of bringing her to our home. I know he can do this but it has been very distressing, he didn't bring her in, but she used to help him pack his car. Anyway I wasn't too perturbed on this occasion as she wasn't on our property. All the same an altercation ensued. My solicitor sent his a letter last week with figures for maintenance pending suite. Giving a breakdown of my outgoings. I have
My savings which I have been living off and not long been awarded PIP
SHE was so angry jumping out of the car telling me I'm a greedy ***
WHY do I want to live in that big house and make HIM pay the bills.
Both of them telling me that I should accept fifty per cent like the law says.
She told me I was a **** wife and that also she was nine years younger!
That I was Making HIM ill.
She also said he us taking this to court and it's going to cost YOU 8k!
Hiwever I held my own and made a joke out of almost everything she said well ex mostly just leaned against the car while she was raving.
I'm sorry this is long.
Anyway basically I kept saying go through the solicitor and ended that if during the course of sorting finances I felt my needs were best served by staying in my big house then that's what I would ask( I know this won't be possible) i came away feeling proud of how I handled the distressing and scary experience. but also worrying why he was parked at the back of the house. The history is since he left I tried many times to talk to him but no response. But he has been sneaking in and out taking what us useful and still have piles of his stuff that he doesn't collect. Now money is on horizon
He is angry and her more so.
They have been waiting for me to go out taking things for example he took all the gardening equipment, so now having to pay a Gardner.
I've had a water leak two months ago, some things weren't covered, I rang him for help, none forthcoming.
Well last night I had a phone call, I didn't realise it was him, upon answering he said listen to what I'm saying, I have cancelled your car insurance, the Dd for water and the Dd tv license( I pay the other bills)
I was shocked but didn't argue just telling him again to go via solicitor he said no I'm telling you and I'm sending you a letter via recorded delivery.
As to the letter from your solicitor I am NOTpaying you any spousal maintenance. Then started on about me accepting fifty Per cent. And stating he knew what I was up to ??! He said he was doing this because of what was said the night before, because I had said (me) that he had to do what was right for him that I didn't care about him and I have to do what's right fir me, so he said you can look after yourself now! Then
Re Pension - you will get no pension as he has rung pension people ( he draws 590 a month) he said that I have to apply for it and the costs incurred (while he was talking to me she was talking in the background, which he said she had every right to do)
The request and doing it Will out way anything I could get.
Re property in Spain, I will not be having any of that ( although previously had an offer from his solicitor for half because he now says he bought it with his pension lump sum, and under Spanish law that means it's his.
He says he has now applied to take the finances to court. He keeps saying HIS money, despite the fact I have worked all our married life but had to finish three years ago due to ill health.
So now I have just 307 to live off a month, yes I have savings but they should be marital pot, so with solicitor fees and court and the length of time this goes on I'm going to run out of money.
We haven't started anything to do really yet with finances
He made an offer weeks ago
50 percent MH
50 percent Spanish house
No
pension share
No savings
We have been married 39 years
My solicitor said no and we need to do
financial disclosure.
I had just been getting my life together a bit , feeling more positive but this has knocked me for six, and now concerned how I'm going to cope with it all
He lives with OW in a different town he has to come out if his way, to come here but is doing just that to see when I'm in or out, so I know it's not advisable but I have had new locks including the shed and garages.
There is not enough money certainly won't be enough left for us both he he continues down this path. My solicitor is not in till Monday, but just wondered if there was anyone who could share a bit if positivity to what I am feeling is an hopeless situation.
I'm not sleeping in fear they are going to turn up, and still in dressing gown now. I'm very jumpy every car that goes past the house or car door
Banging. So sorry for this going on and probably not relevant. Thanks for reading to the end . X
