My partner's decree absolute

My partner was notified of his Decree Nisi back in 2000 but it never got to the absolute stage. Obviously his estranged wife didn't want to apply for it. He's now going to apply for it and he has told me that following his visit to solicitor last week he can automatically apply for it. But first he wants to speak with his wife and agree continuing payments for his daughter, who is now 16, but not for her. Apparently given that 10 years has passed she's not entitled to anything. However, he wants to strike a 'deal' with her, i.e. continue to pay ad infitum what he has been paying over the years on the basis that she doesn't try to get anything else out of him. She originally got all the equity in the house. I'm nervous about this as I still feel after the absolute is granted she'll still have a hold over him and keep coming back for more. Also he's making a will, before the absolute is obtained, and he's been told that once finalised all he has to do is sign something to say it's still valid. I thought you had to write a new one.

I don't know about the Will but I would strongly advise that your partner and his ex sort out the finances before the absolute is applied for. Otherwise either of them can make demands on the other at any time.

When you say "she got all the equity in the house" was that by Consent Order or a court order, or by formal post nuptial/Separation Agreement?

Thanks. This is exactly what I tried to say to my partner when he mentioned writing a will and also applying for the absolute. Done some research on the time lapse between nisi and absolute and I don't think he realises that it's not as straight forward as just sitting down with her and agreeing finances. Maintenance for his daughter is not a problem for me however it's the fact that he's saying, for a quiet life, to keep paying her what he's currently paying. I don't think she'll take it as easy as he thinks - she's never met anyone else and technically I suppose still dependent on the monthly payment she receives from him. Also I'm aware of substantial periodic amounts he's given her. God what a mess!!

Thanks. From what I can remember it was through their individual solicitors whereby he had to agree to the price of sale of the marital home. She then received, I believe, £60k or £80k - he got £5k. I don't know whether a consent order was done via the courts. She then went ahead and purchased a brand new house for her and daughter to live in. She also at the time took early retirement through ill health and has never worked since 2000 - strangely enough just before she petitioned for divorce. I can't help thinking this is all going to get very messy and that the straight forward agreement he's suggesting and going to get his solicitor to draw up (as his solicitor said that after 10 years of separation she's not entitled to any maintenance for herself). My partner has since 2002 with a former work colleague built up quite a successful business and which I believe has considerable equity. No doubt when he approaches her and seeks her own legal advice, as I'm sure she won't agree to anything without doing this, her solicitor will want 'full financial disclosure' - as this was never ever done properly and finalised through the courts which I'm frightened about as my assets might be drawn into it. I bought a house in 2003 and the mortgage, land registry, utilities are all in my name. My partner pays a contribution each month for living expenses but I've made sure this is not linked to the mortgage to try and give myself some protection.

The courts will only over turn an agreement is there is just reason. There must have been a consent order there is no way that either solicitor would have left it to agreement which was not checked by the courts. If they have approved it (which far more than a rubber stamp exercise) there would have had to be full disclosure at that time.

Your assets are not involved so please don't worry.

Thanks. I guess that's a wee bit reassuring about the payment she received through the sale of the house can't be overturned. I believe there was some sort of financial disclosure done, however I don't think a final agreement was reached. My partner just seemed to stop going to his solicitor after the sale of the house. What is the bottom line now on him finalising his divorce? Can she ask for more money, given he's built up a successful business? I know you say my assets are safe but given the length of time we've lived together, 9 years, and 6 years in this house albeit the mortgage etc is in my name, can she argue that because he's paid me a sum of money each month then half the house is his and there fore should be included. He actually owns another property with his brother (his mother lives in it) and at the start she was demanding a quarter share of this. This is oh so confusing. Also the fact that I believe he's planning in his will on leaving a % share of his estate to his wife. If I survive him would the house we're living in have to be included as part of his estate? I'm going crazy about all this and tempted now to start looking at revising my will.