Well this isn't much fun..

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site but came for some help and answers. The whole subject of divorce was totally unchartered territory for me 6 weeks ago, but I'm learning quickly as my soon to be ex husband is moving us quickly through the stages!

He's behaved pretty appallingly - a high flier who thinks he can do as he chooses, and has done. Despite being a real bully and having an affair he's filed against me for my unreasonable behaviour. The grounds are fairly mild, and although they're untrue and unfair I've been advised to accept them so we can move on with the process. I hope this was good advice..?!

Am trying to survive this experience without becoming bitter, I want to be able to move on as soon as possible and eventually find happiness with someone who deserves me. I'm trying to keep a sense of humour in difficult times..!

It's lovely reading of people who've come out the other side. It's a horrible process to go through but hopefully it will lead us to happier things. Nice to meet you all.

hi kettlechip,

Sorry you have the need for wikivorce...but you will find a lot of support/experiences/knowledge/tools/etc to help you through this.

The advice you refer to is in the main correct...appears that the bad uns know no boundaries and the depths they will stoop resemble a bottomless cess pit

Try not to let your ex control the pace! Take care.

E

Thanks E, unfortunately I think you're right where my husband is concerned. I keep expecting an invite to go on Jeremy Kyle - it's all descending into a bit of a farce! What happened to my ordinary life?!

Unfortunately this is ordinary life. Some people stay together. Some break apart and stay friends. Some break apart and hate each other. I am in the last category. I try not to let it affect anything else though.

There is light. Yes there are people out there who deserve you and you them.

Sh*t happens and what does not break you makes you stronger. Stick to what you want and need. If it is to get it over quickly then make compromises where you need to. Only if you feel it benefits you. Not financially but mentally.


Good luck

F

Hi im about the same time scale as you so know exactly what your going through it's difficult to stay upbeat and think of the future just now, hope your ok.

take carex

Blooming heck!

First of all sorry that you need to be here, but I am sure that you will find many supportive peopole!

6 weeks in and the papers already delivered. It sure seems as if you were pretty much in the dark about it all! Seems as if he is a very heartless b'stard!

Hoping that you stay as upbeat as you seem, if not come here and vent, talk, seek advice, etc.

All the best.

Hi Kettlechip

So often the person who leaves has thought about it for a while without having the courtesy - or courage - to tell the one who gets dumped.

It's not worth contesting a divorce, it costs money, takes longer and ultimately you end up divorced anyway.

Reserve what energy you have in looking after yourself and sorting out a decent financial settlement for yourself.