Hello it's me

Well, here I am. My status says "just thinking about divorce", but it's going to happen, it's just a question of which one us pulls the trigger first. The craziness of several years went from unbearable to untenable, and I'm out on a limb. After a few weeks of having no fixed abode, I now have a room with a table for my laptop, so here I am.

I haven't seen my daughter for over a month, and I'm going to have to go to court to get something more than the odd trip to a contact centre, which is what her mother is proposing. (I expect she wanted nothing at all but was advised otherwise by her lawyer.)

On the plus side, my heart is normal (despite what my wife may think, I do have one) according to an ECG, so the chest pains are down to anxiety. And I found some pictures of my little one backed up on the laptop. And I survived another weekend.

Hi Starless, welcome to Wikki. Sorry to hear you're going through a break-up too. It must be awful trying to adjust to a new room & not seeing your child, many on here will relate to you & offer support. Keep posting as everyone will help you through the tough times.
Cindy

Well done Starless - things do slowly get better and in time you will no longer be star less.

Keep your chin up.

Ness

hi Starless,

That is how you feel, dark, and no bright lights to gaze upon?

Horrible place to be, sorry you have not seen your daughter it must be heartwrenching for you.

I too did some sofa surfing for a while when a relationship split up. I used to offer to do friends ironing for a night in their spare room. I was lucky the girls at work were amazing and helped me through some tough times.

Well you have us at wiki now to help you through the nights when you feel you cannot stand to be on your own. There is usually someone around to chat to. Try going into chat, I think you will find someone on there 24/7.

It is a shame that you are going to have to go to court to sort out access to your daughter, expensive and messy.

Take care of yourself, keep posting. There are people on here that will be able to help with with any questions, legal or emotional, you will probably need both.

Hope the stars will slowly clear from the clouds and shine bright again for you soon.
zara

Hello Starless. Sorry to hear about your situation, its a heartbreaking time for you. There is a wealth of information on this site, and people who want to give you all the support they can. Keep posting and reading other people's posts to see how they cope in similar situations.

I hope you get to see your daughter soon and as time goes on things start to gradually become better for you.

Thank you all for your kind words. Last night I also "came out" in an email to the friends who I hadn't been in touch with since the split, and also received a flurry of sympathetic replies. It's just nice to know that not everyone thinks I'm as despicable as my wife does!

Thank you all.

Hi there,

A few words of encouragement and sympathy do wonders. Sometimes you find that people dont actually know how to start a conversation, they might feel uncomfortable about talking to you, not really knowing what to say. I am glad you contacted your friends, it will lift your spirits.

True friends will always be there for you and try and support you as much as they can. Always have a box of tissues, a huge shoulder and a wonderful listening ear!!

I am sure you will soon be able to see your daughter. It will just take time for the dust to settle.

take care and keep posting.
zara