Ode to the Perfect Man

The perfect man is gentle,
And never cruel or mean.
He has a perfect smile,
And is always neat and clean.

The Perfect Man likes children,
And will raise them by your side.
He will be a caring father,
And good husband to his bride.

The Perfect Man loves cooking,
He will clean and vacuum too.
He'll do what's in his power
To show his deep-felt love for you.

The Perfect Man is sweet,
Writing poems with your name;
He's a best friend to your mother,
And will kiss away your pain.

He never has made you cry
Or caused you hurt in any way.
To hell with this endless poem and rhyme,
The Perfect Man is gay.

like it a lot Magicwand

hope they are not all gay!!
Jolly

BRILLIANT! I laughed right out loud. Did you write it?

I wrote this after sharing a bed with an inconsiderate lump for 6 years:

When Duvet Hog married a Bed Hog
She said "my God, this is the end!
My sanity's shot!"
Then pregnant she got
And the kid screamed them both round the bend.

More poetry!!!

I didn't write it, it just makes me smile. Not poetry but here's another fave

A couple were married and, following the wedding, the husband laid down some rules.

"I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want," he insisted. "And, I don't expect any hassle from you. Also, I expect a decent meal to be on the table every evening, unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing with my buddies whenever I want. Those are my rules," he said. "Any comments?"

His new bride replied, "No, that's fine with me. But, just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night ... whether you're here or not."

Just failed to meet the prerequisites of that job miserably!!

On how many out of 20?

do you know
under my faceless name
i KISSED a bi man
nothing else
the night after i fought for my kids
and he was
the best kisser
i suspect anything else would have been a let down
*(she says clenching her cheeks)
gay men are like women with an extra dose of fun bitchiness no regard for whom their saying it too

and why,
extra LONG tounges
you are right
a gay man would be my ideal man
but god
hed have to have
a fit brother