New relationship - age gap??

Loveless marriage for years, finally decided to go my own way 12m+ ago....no one else involved but I''d had enough.

I''ve interacting with a long time friend for the last few months and it''s taken a turn towards strong emotions. He''s lovely, makes me smile, cares for me, shows emotion...pretty much perfect...however...there is an age gap between us....

I''m 46 and he''s 66 although he really doesn''t look it.

I''m wary of this not just because of myself but because I had my children later on in life and my youngest is just 9....

I''ve spent a few weekends away with him and it feels natural but I worry over the problems it may cause with my children. He hasnt met them yet but is really wanting to.

My children come first and foremost and although I''m head over heels for him, they will have the final say.

I dont know anyone who has been in a relationship with such an age gap......advice please

As far as age gaps go I can only cite the case of my friend, the author Robert Rankin. He is in his 60s (63 if my memory serves me right).

He is married to a lovely lady called Rachel Hayward. She is 20 years younger than him. And you know what? They are great together. They compliment one another perfectly. She gives him an energy and spring I didnt see in him before they met. And she is a delight.

If it works for you, and you think it will continue to work... Go with it. And best of luck to you both.

Age is just a number.

It''s how you feel that counts. There are people out there healthier and with a younger outlook on life than those years younger than them.

Forget the numbers and go with what feels right.

From my own experience,I went out with man who is 61,Im 56 so not too bad a gap but my 12 yr old didn''t like him,she said he was too old in his ways.
I did end it because I knew they would never get on and she is my priority but to me the very fact that you are expressing your thoughts shows that you have doubts.
But only you can decide and I do wish you well
xx

To a 9 year old anyone over 16 is ancient. I doubt she''ll notice the age gap. Whether they get on is a different matter entirely.

Plenty of people have relationships with people that are a lot younger or older than them. Age is a number. THats all. What is more relevant however is life experiences. The older ones (trying to be tactful here ) have different life experiences to someone much younger than them. For instance, music. And what I like at 58 (blimey am I?) someone at say 38 may not like. But I think it comes down to what you are like as a person. Not how many candles are on your birthday cake and can you deal with these differences.

Lastly on this subject, at the moment, you are seeing the gloss of a person. The bits that they want you to see. Give it some time, and the real person will come out. Ok I like JessieJ. But I dont like New direction. But I could pretend I do. At least for a while. So what I am saying is give this relationship some time to settle in and the real people that are in it to settle down. But enjoy it what ever you do. We bump into all sorts on our lifes journey and we should at least enjoy all those encounters while they last.

And more concerning is something else you said. My children come first and foremost and although I''m head over heels for him, they will have the final say

What you are saying essentially is that a child, or children have the say over your life. This is so wrong on lots of levels. Its your life. No one has the right to "have there say" or decide its outcome but you. I am sorry, but you cant make the mistake of someone else deciding on your happiness. That is so wrong. I am sorry if this offends you. C.

Marshy is very wise but on this one I disagree. You have an obligation to your daughter; you also have an obligation to yourself. These obligations have somehow to be balanced, neither overrules the other and if your new bf is a decent man he will understand this.