School - private v state

Stop paying the fees you can''t afford, and the school will move him pretty quickly, trust me!

If he is very young, he will ride with the change, like every child, as long as he is a bit prepared for it. Unless he has any condition that makes any change dramatic, but i''m assuming not, since private schools don''t usually have the reputation to be very welcoming to kids with any kind of special needs.

I might completely wrong, it''s only my experience of boys private schools, which are horribly competitive and overpriced in my area!

Terrible situation.

I am sure a member ElizaDoolittle will be able to help here. She had a situation not dissimilar where she had to remove her children from a very exclusive private school because of no funds from her ex and no way of funding it herself. Check her back posts for details.

Her stbx threatened action over it, there seems to be parallels here with your case so it is worth contacting Eliza for her experience.

mediation isn''t legally binding.
Just send an email to your ex that having analysed your financial position. It is absolutely impossible for you to contribute to private school fees.
That she needs to manage her expectations of what is achievable financially as you will not be paying.
That she must take the state school place on Monday.
You need to be stronger.
In the end they just fleece you for as much as they possibly can.
Painted up as all being for the kids.
But she''ll be in a house with her new fella going on more holidays than Judith Chalmers. Whilst you''ll still be shelling out child maintenance, paying for the kid when he''s with you and forking out about £15000 per annum in rent/ mortgage. Just to keep a roof over your head.
Say NO and stick to it. Because you wil really struggle to pay all this it''s another 10 years minimum coz the govt will have strung this out to include university by the time he gags there. All the mothers whine about that already. The thin end of the wedge is already there with the payments till they''re twenty in mickey mouse 12 hour a week technical college courses.
All the best
HRH x

Thanks for your comments Juliette, shoegirl and HTL. Much appreciated.

Child is 7 - starting yr 3 - so I think he''ll be alright but he has now been at the other school for three days.... Yr 3 is a funny year anyway - arguably one that can easily be recovered from any disruption.


Maybe the real challenge is that my ex still seems to be able to guilt/manipulate me into doing things she wants, usually through threatening the security of the kids. Was the same when we were married - really do need to move on!

out of interest where was the little one before he started school this week state school or private?

I think a 7 year old will have no problems adjusting to a change of school, and I can''t see how a court could direct you to pay unless you agreed. If you can''t afford it, surely that settles the matter.