Amendment to Court Order

Everyones help appreciated.

I have a court order for contact / access for my 7 year old daughter from Friday at 5pm until Sunday at 9am every other weekend.

At court (January 2015) I was self represented she had a solicitor. I was persuaded / bullied into agreeing certain things with the agreement that my ex wife would allow more time if I need it.

I now wish to increase my time with my daughter but my ex wife will not agree and keep saying the court order says ....... so no I wont let you. She is unapproachable and verbally aggressive when asked.

I have spoken to her solicitor and he is no help at all.

When I travel to my parents in Devon I have to get my daughter up at 5am for the 4 hour journey back to the north midlands for the 9am drop off its ridiculous.

My daughter has spoken and said that she is sad at drop off and does not want to continue living with ex wife because she sees that she is stopping my time with her.

My ex will not even let my daughter call me to "catch up"

Can I raise an amendment to the court order ? Please Can Someone give me advice

When you say "9am drop-off" - is this a Monday morning and therefore school start time? Or do you return on the Sunday?

It is possible to return to court to amend an existing order, but given that you have only had the order for a matter of 5 months, it may be premature to return to court so early.

Why was telephone contact not written into the order? Did you request it?

How often do you visit your parents, and is it at weekends?

Thanks RubyTuesday, the 9am drop off is on a Sunday morning (so not a school day), the reason I agreed to the 9am drop off was because my ex wife stated that my daughter went to Church / Sunday School. In 5 months she has been once, I was obviously lied to.

The bottom line is that I pick up my daughter on a Friday at 5pm, so she is tired after her week at school and Is normally asleep by 8pm. I then have Saturday with her and drop her at 9am Sunday. Therefore I literally have her for 1 full day.

The telephone contact was not in the court order but my daughter wants to call me but my ex wife wont let her.

As mentioned I was mislead at court by her solicitor (and lied to) and got steam rollered into agreeing things I shouldn''t.
My ex wife does not care about my daughter only what she can do to make my life awkward. (any parent would not want her daughter to be woken up at 5am to be driven 4 hours home for 9am drop off unless it was important)

I go to my parents maybe once every 2 months on the weekend I have her so that she can see them.

The court said that we had to be flexible which she agreed to but again was another lie.

thanks for any advice

Thanks for the additional information.

How do you know that your daughter hasn''t been to Sunday School more than once in those 5 months? (You need to be completely sure about this rather than relying on hearsay)

Courts always tell parents they have to be flexible, and often write in a clause that has little to no meaning or effect "and other contact as agreed".

Friday 5pm - 9am Sunday isn''t a weekend; and it''s certainly not enough to allow your daughter to enjoy proper time with you and develop her relationship with you. Having to return her at 9am because of Sunday School says that that is more important than her relationship with you. As much as I try to encourage parents to stay out of courts, there are situations where court is appropriate - and I would suggest that you apply to Court for an amendment to the current arrangements. Make sure you set out very clearly what it is you are asking for - ie drop off at school, on the Monday, make sure the holiday arrangements are clear (there was an issue re you booking a holiday recently), etc.

Thanks RubyTuesday,
I have tried to speak to my ex via text, phone calls and letters, she has now told her son to call me to
Explain that she doesn’t want any contact with me and request any future correspondence to go through the solicitor.
The holiday thing has been agreed via solicitor but i am still waiting for it in writing.
I have another real problem in that when i collect my daughter on a Friday I am met with verbal abuse and aggression.
In fact it is now a regular thing my daughter is often in tears and scared of what is happening.
I am now worried when I take her home that she is being subjected to similar things
She has been violent towards the children and myself in the past (and arrested) and is taking no medication for her aggressive behaviour which is extremely worrying.
The courts also said that although she was advised to take counselling she did not.
I think i might push for custody im at the end of my tether L

It''s right that if she is represented that you communicate with her solicitor rather than her directly.

Where does the Friday night handover take place - at Mums home? Might it be more appropriate to request a neutral venue - or even better, you collect your daughter directly from school.

Courts will only transfer residence as a last resort - that''s not to say it''s not the right thing for you to do in your situation, but you would need to demonstrate that your daughter is at risk if she remains living with her Mum.

I would suggest that in the meantime, you put together a parenting plan which take into account your proposed amendments and submit an application to Court. If you are concerned about your daughter''s welfare and strongly believe that she is being subjected to abuse - either physical or emotional - then you must complete a C1A also.

(I''ve removed your daughter''s name from the post - please don''t post details which could identify your daughter - I also suggest that you change your profile picture to something that is a photo of you to ensure your anonymity)

Thanks for the info about daughter i didn’t realise that i included her name. I have updated my pic as instructed

OK, her solicitor tells me that he is NOT instructed however he continues to negotiate between us.
However he did say the last time i spoke to him Friday morning “this has to stop” and he would speak to her about it.
(So it seems he is doing all this for free ...... im not even going there about why ?).

Friday night handover is at 5pm at Mums. This has been stated in the court order that i collect and drop off from Mums.
She will not negiotiate on this pickup place or time (as i asked to pick her up early on Good Friday)

Thanks for your advice