Fathers right in maintaining access for grandparen

No, a parenting plan is not an escalation - it is a sensible, child-focused approach that is commonly used by separating parents.

Wikivorce isn't a father's or mother's forum - Wikivorce is an all-inclusive site, for everyone affected by family break-up - this means that our members are able to give a wide range of views, thoughts, shared experiences and perspectives. Often it is it hearing differing perspectives and thoughts that can make a real difference to how an individual deals with their own situation.

You are allowing your own unfortunate experience to influence your responses to others. Not all ex-wives are like your ex, not all situations are like yours. If you are going to respond to posts, please do so constructively, and respect that our members include both men and women.

Still it is an escalation and will be viewed as such by an ex who is already bordering on being unreasonable.

Bad advice Ruby.

Some of us have been through extremely hostile child contact applications and are just better placed to advise on the pitfalls. The family court is vicious.

You wiki people seem only too keen to push people down that road without first hand experience of how destructive it is.

You are making massive assumptions about the Op's situation, nowhereman.

Just because you've been through the courts doesn't make you an expert.

I'm not pushing the OP to do anything - and certainly not down the road to court action.

I suspect your time here will be short.

I was advised by my solicitor not to go down the court route as I had managed to negotiate 50/50 with my ex, which he said was practically unheard of and that the courts do still favour the majority of contact with the mother.

If you can keep communication with the mother constructive and positive you will probably make better headway that through the formal legal process. That's not to say that once you have managed to reach an agreement it shouldn't we written up as a formal agreement.

The mother doesn't sound to be completely unreasonable as you did manage to agree 2-3 days per week. If possible I think you should try to establish why she has decided that the paternal grandparents should be excluded. This could be a simple misunderstanding - these can happen often when communication becomes strained.

I remember when I first separated, my STBX's mother was very involved with contact (still is) - which I was fine with. But the kids would come back and tell me that the MIL would ask them all sorts of prying questions and make undermining statements about me.

Hopefully you can clear the air, find the cause of her change of heart and get back on track.