Married but apart...what about our future?

Updating from my last post........had another meeting with my solicitor today following a meeting with my mediator, I am a bit concerned as the mediator said that my marriage was classed as short one (from Oct 2009 til present but we co habited from 2004) but my solicitor has assured me that is classed as a 7 year marriage if there is any advise with I would gladly like to hear it.

Kind regards M

When there are children involved length of marriage seems to have less relevance.

There seems to be conflicting ideas as to what is short, long and in between anyway.

Updating from my last post....me and my soon to be ex husband have now got to the mediation stage in our divorce, we both had separate meetings with our mediator to discuss our issues and what we wanted resolving. After this an appointment was set up a meeting together to discuss the issues already raised with our mediator, I went into the meeting with confidence knowing that I had done all my homework!
The meeting was understood by myself and soon to be ex husband in accordance with fairness and talks were edging towards myself walking away with a one fifth of our estate (not sure how fair that was on my part) but the mediator expressed that it was fair in accordance to what he could afford which I found laughable!
After this meeting we were then meant to go on and have our last meeting to come to an agreement, we had to wait another 6 weeks which gave me time to be advised by my legal representative and then to write down any issues i had. But 22 hours before our appointment my soon to be ex husband cancelled due to him saying that he was waiting on paperwork!! The mediator then gave me me another appointment for 3 weeks later, the mediation service was then to contact him to make sure that the appointment was convenient, but 7 days went by with no reply which then meant I lost the appointment slot,(mediation sent him numerous texts and phone calls) without any response on his behalf. The mediation services have now contacted me saying that they are passing the case to our mediators hands to review. This is so frustrating can anyone advise me on what happens if he doesn''t contact mediation, what would be the next process?

Kind regards M

Edging towards you walking away with one fifth?

How can an 80/20 split of assets in your ex''s favour when you have the majority care of the children be deemed to be fair?

Starting point would be 50/50 with you possibly negotiating more than 50% for yourself

I would say that one fifth in your favour is extremely unfair.
My advise, although I am far from legally qualified, would be take him to Court if you can afford to do so.
You definitely should get a 50/50 split of assets and in my view more!

Just updating on my last post, been today for what was meant to be my last mediation session with my soon to be ex husband and what a joke it was. The session seemed to be focusing intensely through the mediator towards finance and settlement and a positive follow up from our last session. The highlights were of the nature of that my soon to be ex husband offering me and the children 8% of the £90,000 equity in the house, as a result I refused which resulted in my soon to be ex husband walking out of the session and then returning after 10 minutes and then the mediator making a comment saying it has taken you 5 months to come up with this offer £8,500 why are you wasting my time. Obviously I have a certain figure in my head, but have no real idea of what I should be asking for or negotiating to. The mediator has given us one final meeting in 6 weeks time and I want to be ready for this and hopefully finalise a settlement before it goes too far and goes to court.

If there is anyone who could instruct me or give me any advise on how much myself and the children can reasonably walk away with out of the £90,000 asset of the house I would be greatful, I know I''m not going to get 50% as I have been told this by the mediator I know he''s going to get the larger share of the asset but if anyone can advise me on that matter that has been through it themselves or anyone with a legal background then maybe I can walk into the next session prepared.

Thank you kind regards M.

Not sure why you are going to get less than your ex? Apart from the house, what assets do you have with regard to pensions, savings etc?