Can wife stop my partner being with me and my kids

Hello

I have recently separated, though I have good access to the kids my wife is claiming that legally she can prevent my new partner from being in my house when my kids come to spend time with me.

During visits my new partner makes herself scarce and we make sure the time is spend just with Daddy and we usually go out.

My wife however hates this and is claiming she can prevent the kids (7 and 4) from coming to my house if my new partner is there. My partner has no criminal history at all, is a mother of 3 girls herself and is a known by my kids.

Any hints much appreciated.

Seany

No, Seany, she can't prevent your partner being in the house when your children are there.

What she can do is make contact difficult for you, force you to apply through the courts for contact, and even end contact completely.

Children should be introduced to new partners with some sensitivity, both to the feelings of the children and of their other parent. It may simply be too early for their mother to deal with this (you say you have separated recently), she may be jealous, or she may be trying to control any further relationship you may have.

Was your new partner the reason your relationship ended? If so, your ex may be justifiably bitter. Tread cautiously and tactfully or you may be building up a whole world of trouble for yourself.

If she's going to make contact difficult she will do it anyway and you'll find that a new partner is just one of many excuses.

I don't have a new partner but my ex has had one since a few weeks after I left BUT that has never stopped her from making it as difficult and as stressful as possible for all concerned.

T

You say you are recently separated and have a new partner. Do you actually live with your partner?

Most advice is to introduce new partners very carefully and slowly. This is for your kids benefit as well as showing respect to your ex. New relationships do not always last and if your kids form a bond with your new partner and this does not work out (as obviously your marriage didn't) the kids then have to get used to another loss.

Don't just see it as a benefit to your ex. You need to show you are committed to your kids.

First I'd suggest you change your name so your email addy isn't available for everyone to see.

Secondly, I'd advise being sensitive to your wife.

I found it really difficult just having them spend Boxing Day with ex and his partner. And that was 6 months after he'd left us.

Thank you very much for you reply. My new partner and I do not live together. We do spend time at the weekends together.

Good advice re gentle introductions which we are doing. I was really thinking of maybe 3-4 months time when I hope I will have begun to re-establish my relationship with the children before they see my new partner in the same house as me.

Many thanks

Seany