man seeking child maint. from ex wife

My ex husband and I had an informal maintenance agreement for the last 10 years, and he paid maintenance to me for our daughter who lived with me for 10 years. She has now gone to live with my ex husband who now wants me to pay the same amount of maintenance as he has always paid for her. I do not work choosing to be a stay at home mum (i am not on benefits), and as such have no income. I have remarried and my 2nd husband earns about £55,000 which obviously supports me. My ex husband is demanding that payments for our daughter should be made from my second husbands salary at the same rate he has always paid. Is this correct. My 2nd husband already pays for children of his own under a CSA agreement, wich first husband doesnt seem to realise would be taken in account. Would I be assessed personally or will my 2nd husband have to pay for a child that isnt his? thanks

Your income, even if its all tax credits and benefits, would be the only one assessed.

Perhaps the answer would be to find work or reach a voluntary agreement?

hi, thanks for the quick reply, i have no income and we dont qualify for tax credits.

I am happy to pay for daughter, but not as much as my ex husband was paying for her, but he is insistent on going to hte CSA as he thinks he will get more money as I will have to declare my new husbands salary.

Thanks

Candybar

Think about the message you are giving your daughter here:

You are effectively saying to he "Dad was happy to work and pay for you when you lived with us, I am not happy to work and pay for you now you live with him" is that really the message you want to send her?

I'm afraid that even if you have children with your new husband this does not relinquish you from the responsibility of your elder/eldest child. She was presumably there first and her needs should have been taken into consideration before having more children. If you and your husband have jointly decided that you should stay at home then you and your husband have a moral responsibility to decide between you how you are going to support any original children either of you might have. If you have decided only one wage is coming in, then it is that one wage that has to support all existing children.

candybar wrote:

I am happy to pay for daughter, but not as much as my ex husband was paying for her,

Not wishing to sound rude but why not? Grass is never greener and when the boot is on the other foot it's such hardship.

He's paid his dues now it's your turn.

ex earns about £15k more than my hubby now...and also pays for 3 children to his first wife.

its not that I dont want to pay for her we have always been very amicable in the past 10 years over maintenance and contact, just my 2nd hubbby is worried that his first children wont be taken into account.

I think we need to make a distinction between the legal and moral situation here. As far as I am aware your new husband's income is not taken into account at all in setting child maintenance by the CSA. So your second husband's ability to pay for his other children should not be compromised.

I think other posters are arguing, though, that you have a moral obligation to support your daughter, maybe by going out to work. I don't think the CSA can make you do this, let alone make you pay what your ex used to pay to you, but it may well be good for your relationship with your daughter, particularly if your ex is likely to tell her that he paid for years but you aren't prepared to, if you could take enough of a job to pay some child maintenance.

best wishes,
Sadie