When is it financial abuse?

Hi

My husband has been paying child support for 3 years. We went through mediation and have a MOU but this was never made into a Consent Order (mostly because I was really unhappy with the outcome).

My husband failed to provide P60s for three years stating that he had no pay increase.

Last September he told me he had a pay increase of 1.5%, but that any actual increase was eaten up in tax.

I since found out that he had a pay rise and bonus every year, but lied about this.

In the MOU it is very unclear what is the baseline for his salary- only a net monthly amount is given, and no P60 in the financial documents. The MOU goes on to state that any increase should be calculated against his ‘gross salary’ , but nowhere is his gross salary listed to provide a baseline.

This has enabled him to lead me a merry dance as the calculations are open to interpretation.

Any advice please? I have an appointment to see a solicitor this week.

What is an MOU?

On what basis does he pay CM? Is it a private agreement? If it is a private agreement then if either of you changes their minds it is no longer an agreement. It can't be enforced.

If you're unhappy with the current arrangement you could apply to CMS for assessment.

Where are you in the divorce process?

Thanks for your reply. The MOU is the Memorandum of Understanding produced by the mediator. As you say- it is effectively a private agreement and he can pay or not pay as he wishes.
We had mediation 3 years ago & had been muddling along, but recently he is refusing to pay.
I have a Decree Nisi but have not formalised the consent order or divorce. I’m seeing a solicitor this week and hope she will be able to help with this.

Remember if you want CM in a Court Order you both have to agree.

If you're already having problems CMS might be the quickest, cheapest and easiest route.

Why were you unhappy with original suggestions for a Consent Order?

The mediator insisted that the split should be 50-50. I had given up my career when we married & didn’t work for 14 years whilst looking after the children.

My husband was able to get a mortgage on a 4 bed house and use his high income to pay for this. I was left with £200k and no possibility of a mortgage. This never seemed fair to me.

I want to go back and revisit this outcome.

50/50 is always the starting point and presumably the mediator was basing their advice with full knowledge of all the facts.

Post details of ages, incomes, children and all assets and people will suggest possible outcomes.

If your ex is adequately housed and has used his mortgage raising capacity to achieve this then that is in your favour. He will need less of the asset pot to house himself. If that leaves you housed and mortgage free it's a positive.

Ok- thanks. I’ll pull together the figures and do that.