Financial irresponsibility

My x2b spent our whole marriage getting ito financial difficulties. Catalogues/book clubs/credit cards etc. She worked and kept most of her income throughout the marriage with me paying the bills etc.
The break up is largely down to the stresses etc caused by years of this poor financial situation. She is now moving on and no doubt will be very well off. But do the courts consider bailiffs/debts and non-contribution to the household finances when agreeing a settlement (or does the father get rifted as usual?).
Also can any of the settlement be put in trust for the kids to save it being frittered away by the mother??

I'd really like to know the answer to this too.

When I met my ex2b she was in debt (not huge) that I paid off when we married as I was solvent. She also did not contribute to any household bills despite my protestations. I basically paid off all her debts, paid for everything, all bills/furniture, her car and car running costs (even the wedding/honeymoon).

Her parents have similar financial skills and are up to their ears in debt in their 60s, and I am worried about my children's long term financial security if she continues in the same vein.

Also, she has started running up debts since we separated 2 months ago (credit card, overdraft max'd and considering a loan). This is despite me paying for all the white goods and the rent/deposit 6 months in advance when she moved out, and clearing her overdraft so she started with a clean slate.

Will the ultimate settlement be based on our financial positions at the point of divorce, or separation? The former seems unfair considering I am being financially responsible and she manages 3 pub lunches a week and regular trips to Starbucks with the kids despite only working part-time.

I was going to leave it 2 years for divorce despite her now having a relationship with a guy she works with (started 6 weeks after we split up apparently, but may be an indication of why things had been so bad over the past year!). Now I'm thinking there is no chance we can make it work and I should go for divorce on grounds of adultery.

Then I've only known about this relationship for two weeks and my head is still spinning. So maybe I'm just thinking the worst?

Hey Guys,
I'm divorcing my wife because of a similar situation. Basically she worked against me financially the whole marriage by running up debts which I paid off. The strawbreaker was when she attempted to get a huge secured loan against the house by forgery and fraud in order to clear up a bunch of debt I didn't know about. My advice.., do not under any circumstances pay off any more debts that are solely in her name, or in any way make them joint debts. Echo3, its over for you mate... Been there... she's gone, and better for you to pull the plug on it now and petition for divorce so she doesn't sting you for costs too. The longer you stay in the marriage, she has more opportunity to hurt you financially.

Hi,

I am goin through a similar situation... my ex brought 18K worth of debt into the marriage.. and to lower re-payments.. I secured it against my property.

The secured loan is on both names, but the property is just under mine.

After 11 months of marriage, we split. She is now taking no ownership of the loan, but luckily, her name is still on the loan.

We will be fighting the stance that;

1) It was a short marriage
2) The debt was pre marital and I did not benefit from it
3) Since it was a short marriage, she should walk away with what she came with.. ie take her mess (debt) back
4) We are now legally divorced, but unless it was GROSS misconduct, the courts are not interested in reasons for divorce.
5) They will take into account contribution into account for settlement. The ex was a reckless spender and contributed very little into the marriage.

Good luck

hope this helps.... but I am not an expert.. may need to be investigated further....

Hi all,

Might as well start with very similar sentence "I am going through similar situation",.
My husband of 10 years put me through hell and back. One repossesion 8 years ago which had to be saved by me and my sisiter, and now because he went bankcrupt the trustee are going after his share of the MH. 2 children and me are soon to be homeless if I dont pay the trustee. I am divorcing him now although I hate to give him a clean slate, free from bankruptcy, new relationship and me deal with the strugle.
To all of you in similar situation I can say DO NOT PAY for his /her personal debts BUT if there is mortgage, services charges, council tax in both names I am afraid you will have to unless you want to loose the property or sell.

Good luck and all the best to all uf us

You don't say what your property equity has grown to in meantime.

The debt is joint -Court will not go behind this BUT if equity has gone up say by £36K the Crt would probably give her no interest in the ppty.

You KNEW of the debt before marriage and AGREED to take on board the responsibility therefore the Court in this case will NOT frind it is financial irresponsibility.

i thought my divorce was settled, i had to give her 13k and take on the debts totaling 46k, when i have gone for a re mortgage they have said i am financially untouchable because the ex did not pay any of the debt and i only paid what i could. the debt and interest is rising at £400 a month and she is now claiming interest on the lump sum which i have to pay her. if i sell the house i will have no where to live as i cant afford the rents and according to the mortgage company i just earn enough to pay them which is £100 less a month than rent. she said she would pay off a secured loan but as not paid a penny in 20 months. the amount i have paid for her is £8000 but it is still in arrears. she as paid nothing, let the debt increase and is claiming interest on her lump sum. my credit rating is bad because of her not paying a loan in joint names. she is living with her new partner having holidays, nights out, on her forth car and bought new furniture but wont contribute to the debt as she says she has no money. i think my sol is working for her as she said it is my fault???? talk about men getting s**t on. me and my/her son will be homeless but at least she will be debt free and have a lump sum of money. for 20 years she blow all the money we had on herself now she taking more, can i get the money off her to get my credit rating back on track? she has done nothing since she left except make it hard for me and the kids while she has had a better lifestyle than the one i could give her because i was losing my job, if it was the other way round i would have to give her loads of money thought we lived in a society where everyone is equal but unfortunately some are more equal than others