Impossible situation

I don''t really know where to start if I''m truly honest.

I separated from my husband a little while ago, which involved selling the house and me finding another house of which the children and myself live.
My husband has moved back with his parents and see''s the kids as and when they feel like. (Which is fine)

The separation was a result of a financial dispute, we have been married for 25 years and were married very young but I love my husband very much and at the time of the separation the communication was just horrendous. We went from "the perfect marriage" to something undescribable.
We have been apart for about 8 months and to be honest the longer we are apart the worse it seems to be. He has had a breakdown before but at the moment he is not good. We said initially we would sort it out and work to get back on track but now he doesn''t want to talk and has all the symptoms of a breakdown. He says I left him whilst I feel I had no option due to our circumstances and I was backed into a corner.
After initially telling him what I proposed (separation) I then asked him to move with us but he point blank refused and still does.
He says he loves me and he is still in love with me but says he can''t see a way forward. There is no one else involved.
I speak to him and text him every day as I am so worried about him but he has now asked me to stop.
He has sought help from a councilling service but I think he seems worse.

I would hope that there may be someone who can identify with this situation.

I can''t identify with the situation but I can say that you can''t sort out your husband''s problems. Only he can do that.

You are faced with deciding to live without him, possibly divorcing and moving on, or living without him but hoping somehow it will get better and you will return to where you were. Or carrying on as you are, trying to make contact that he doesn''t seem to want.

Do you really believe that before the problem your marriage was "perfect"? Even if your husband does decide he wants to work with you, it is very unlikely that things would be the same.

Have you thought about counselling for yourself? It can be helpful in clarifying your thoughts and feelings and sorting out what you can do with what you can''t.

Thank you for the response.

I think the issue is that we both see things in a totally different way and are having difficulties seeing each other''s perspectives.

I did go to councilling for around 4 sessions but I felt that whilst it helped me get a lot off my chest it didn''t help with a solution. I do understand that it''s an impartial non judgemental environment but I think I am looking for someone to help fix it.

It would be easy for me to finish the whole thing as I''m financially independent and have made a new home but I really want to try and save it.
I do agree I can''t sort out how he feels but I think I''m frustrated and don''t know what I should be doing for the best. xxx

You said you were looking for someone to help you fix it, but the only person who can fix it is you.

You can''t repair your marriage if your husband isn''t willing.

I could be totally wrong, but you have moved house, you are financially independent and have lived without your husband for 8 months. It seems to me that your marriage is probably over but you are finding it difficult to acknowledge that. It is hard to end it. In my case, my husband and I are only just going through divorce now, after 7 years of separation. We could have done it earlier, but it seemed so final. Silly, as we''ve both moved on.

I do know, that my ex and I have different views about our marriage and we are only agreed that it is over. It''s about all we do agree on!