Finances during divorce

Good morning

My husband and I have separated and he is filing for divorce. we were together for 19 years and have 2 children, married for 10. Children are 10 and 8 years old.

We have a house with approx £244000 equity which the children and I live in, my husband rents a different house currently. I wish to stay in the house as the children need stability and they have lived there all of their lives. Also where we live I could not downsize to save money as the houses here are so expensive.

My husband owns land abroad worth £30,000 and has pensions worth around £37000. He earns approx £100,000 annually, £5400 monthly. He has approx £50,000 on credit cards which is his sole debt.

I earn approx £22000 (£1700) monthly and have approx £1000 in a pension. I have £2000 on a credit card which is my sole debt.

The children stay with him for 1 night every other weekend, I take care of them and always have done and their activities etc for the rest of the time. I fit this around my full time job. I have supported him from his first ever job to where he is now.

He has been paying £1500 to me until now to include child maintenance and spousal maintenance. He has also been paying half of the mortgage until we have sorted this out.

He is now proposing that he walks away from the house and it is signed over to me and that from now on he will only pay statutory child maintenance (which I believe to be 16% of his gross salary) and that we have no future claims over each other.

I do not know whether to agree to this or not. I feel uncomfortable not 'buying' him out of the house as we went into it 50/50 but have to bear in mind how much I can borrow to buy him out as well and still manage to pay all of the bills etc. I worry that he has big debts and I would like to give him a lump sum in cash.

This has not been an amicable split so I cannot talk to him about it.

Could anyone please shed any light as to a fair split please taking into account all of the above?

Doesn't matter if you went into the house 50/50 it's part of the pot to be split. You want the house and he is offering it as part of the settlement.

Could you afford the mortgage payments and running costs?

His pension savings seem small given salary. Presumably your pension was started very recently.

SM is based upon need and ability to pay. Can you demonstrate a need? Presumably he will have spare cash after his monthly outgoings.

Thanks for you reply.

I could just about afford to pay the mortgage and running costs.

He has opted out of pensions before to have more net pay every month as he has always lived at the top of his pay packet and some, hence the £50K debt, that is why he doesn’t have more in pensions. My pension only started a couple of years ago.

I can demonstrate need however he wants to sort this out between us, without professional help to decide what to split and I am just so confused as to what to agree to.

How old are you each?

Have you looked at what benefits you will be entitled to?

What would you prefer? The majority of the assets which gives you certainty and to keep the home you want or fewer assets and SM which may get reduced if his circumstances were to change?

Whatever you choose make sure it is tied up in a Consent Order by the court and not just some private agreement.

WYSPECIAL wrote:

How old are you each?

Have you looked at what benefits you will be entitled to?

What would you prefer? The majority of the assets which gives you certainty and to keep the home you want or fewer assets and SM which may get reduced if his circumstances were to change?

Whatever you choose make sure it is tied up in a consent order by the court and not just some private agreement.

I am 38 years old, he is 43. I cannot claim any benefits since the change to universal credit from tax credits. I would prefer to keep the house but feel guilty due to his debt I guess. I plan to get the agreement drawn up legally once we have come to an agreement.

I would look at it as you need somewhere to live with your children.
They have a settled home and you wouldn’t have the hassle of moving.
I would take the deal of you get the house and CM, as things can change and at least this way you have somewhere to live and can afford it on your own if you have to.
Look on entitled to website for what you may be able to claim as a single parent.
Good luck

Under60 wrote:

I would look at it as you need somewhere to live with your children.
They have a settled home and you wouldn’t have the hassle of moving.
I would take the deal of you get the house and CM, as things can change and at least this way you have somewhere to live and can afford it on your own if you have to.
Look on entitled to website for what you may be able to claim as a single parent.
Good luck

Thank you for your reply, it makes sense, especially where my children are concerned. I guess I just need to try and lose the feeling of guilt.