divorce- the more i read the more confuse i get!

how can you have a highly contested divorce if you do not object to the divorce?Reading through all these is making me confused. And how is it that you ahve to apply to decrre absolute 6 wks after Decree Nisi if you still have not come to a financial arrangement.

im not sure bout ur first ?, but about the absolute, my sol has told me that u can apply for the abso 6 weeks and 1 day after the nisi date. A lot of ppl apply for abso after finances are all sorted, as it is an incentive for ur partner to get things moving (as long as he also wants a divorce)...if he isnt bothered with getting a divorce and it is more you that wants to D then it is ok to apply for abso, without sorting out finances

ranj ,my husband will be petitioning for the divorce as I thinks he needs tp marry his girlfriend,what I am worried is that he can apply for the absolute before the financial side is sorte dout as it is going to be a very complicated one.Thanks for your responce

Hi Mariaa

One of the reasons I applied for the divorce is that as the petitioner you have a bit more control of the timing.
My sol told me in the first 2 weeks it would take me 6 months before I was ready to divorce him. She was right and I get my nisi next week one week short of 6 months. She has controlled the pace and he can't apply for absolute for 3months so again it's a bit more time to get the finances sorted.
As for the first part if it's not contested then it should just go through.
None of my business really but why aren't you divorcing him for adultery and going for costs?

Hmmmm - don't blame you for getting confused !! You are in good company.

If he rushes to the altar without sorting the finances out he may perhaps weaken his position in subsequent negotiations, in a number of ways . Marry in haste and repent at leisure !!

I'm not sure whether I wouldn't give him the rope and let him hang himself with it - - - -

But I assume you have a solicitor, you'd be foolish not to, if the case is complicated.

The things that spring to my mind are :

1. If he has a new wife, this may well mean higher spousal maintenance than might otherwise be the case, if SM is an issue.
2. It might perhaps strengthen your position in negotiations regarding the former marital home.
3. There is the so-called remarriage trap but I
can't think he'd be daft enough to fall for it.
4. By remarriage I think he loses the right to make any claim against your estate under the Inheritance Family Provisions Act. Hopefully that will not matter for a very long time !!

I'd ask your solicitor for advice ; it is, as you say, better to sort out the finances before the absolute. But there are all sorts of implications ; some people, when they know their spouse is desperate to re-marry, will use delay to pressurise the other side. There are tactical issues involved here and I don't feel it would be safe for me to attempt to offer you more than general advice.



Mike 100468