Where to start !

After seeing someone for 22 years, on and off, I had a job offer in an Islamic country that was difficult to turn down. We had to get married for her to come with me and the plan was for her to seek work as it was her idea to come here so she could work and earn tax free. We were separated on and off due to constant arguing. She is bipolar and very nasty when it suits her and refuses to take medication for it.

So I applied for jobs and got one. Since arriving she has decided she does not want to work (or wants to work the minimum) and I am to pay for everything. I made it clear the marriage was only for practical reasons as I do not want my finances tied up with hers for obvious reasons. She has a very bad temper, is manipulative and enjoys arguing.

She now has a part-time job so she can fit in all of her social life, while I pay for everything and work 10+ hour days. I earn about double as her part time job, which she sees as reason for me to pay for literally everything. She continues as a verbal bully and uses tantrums to manipulate and control me into getting her own way and paying for everything she wants. She thinks she should pay for nothing because we got married.

We both now have residence permits so there is no need to carry on with the deception I am considering separation with a view to divorce. As mentioned I did not want to get married but had no choice as I would have found it too difficult coming on my own.

Where to start with a divorce, ideally amicable (unlikely) and how to protect my assets. I do not see she should have any of the money I have worked hard for and she owns her own home and pension. We have been married 18 months, but separation is the best solution and divorce.

Time to move on. Advice please.

Sounds awful and a tricky situation to get out of - you''ve been together for a very long time. I don''t know if the judge would take the time you''ve been together before you got married into consideration in any shape or form but first of all, stop paying for everything, she has a job after all, separate and seek legal advice - asap. You already said it yourself with your last setence.

Whether you got married for convenience or not is irrelevant, as far as the courts are concerned you're married now so you just need to accept that. This also means there is not "your assets" and "her assets" there is just assets and these will be divided according to how the court decides is fair.

I suspect the best way to protect your position is to file for divorce in the Islamic country where you are living now so that country has jurisdiction. If your ex runs back to the UK files for divorce there I suspect the outcome will be much worse for you.