It seems like nothing is being accomplished

My wife and I separated, initially temporarily, in February when I moved out at her request. She informed me she was divorcing me 2-3 months later and I got the official paperwork at the start of June.
There was discussion the first 3 months who was going to live where and so on, I stayed in various short-term places before agreeing to rent somewhere for 6 months to give us time to figure things out without that pressure. Part of the 'deal' was that if I agreed to do that, she would move quickly and amicably to figure out the longer term division of assets and so on - we both filled in form E at her request.

I've now been in this place 3 months and Form E were exchanged about the same period ago. As far as I am concerned, nothing has been accomplished since. It was agreed that once Form E was sorted we would have some sort of mediated discusion about the house, etc but every contact from me asking about this has been ignored. Every couple of weeks I got some email from her solicitor asking "why haven't you included a valuation for this household item on the form" but I haven't heard from them for 6 weeks now.
We have limited direct communication (email, CC'ed to a trusted friend so it's transparent) and more and more, basic questions are being answered not for a week or more, or ignored entirely. This is again not what was agreed.

I don't know how long these things take but I'm getting increasingly frustrated - she is living in the big house bought with my inheritance, with most of our/my things, which we are jointly paying for, and I'm in a kind of limbo. My 6 month tenancy period runs until around Christmas and though I said I expected to realistically be here longer, I made it very clear that's on the proviso things are moving along and I don't think that's the case.

I keep wanting to write her a letter outlining this but am nervous it will come over badly. The radio silence of late makes me somewhat ill at ease, but that could just be in my head.

Is this sort of timing normal and I should just hunker down and wait, or is it reasonable to be contacting her - or her solicitor - and politely but firmly making my frustration known? I feel I'm bending over backwards and letting her have things her way because that's the more gracious way to act, but I have the return to return to our home at any point; I don't want to be threatening "hurry up or else" but...

What incentive is there for her to hurry things up when the current situation is exactly what she wants?

WYSPECIAL wrote:

What incentive is there for her to hurry things up when the current situation is exactly what she wants?

I do not get the impression she particularly wants to be living in "our forever home" on her own - it is large and isolated and full of memories.

That said on a practical level you have a point, but what exactly do you suggest can/should be done about it? The only pressure I can think of is "I'll move back in" but that's unkind and somewhat a nuclear option.
I don't want to be moving in the winter myself or for the house to sit empty, it's really the lack of communication. Talking about how we want to divide assets doesn't force her to any timeline, it just means we have a better idea where each other stand.

You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink.

It sounds like I am in a fairly similar situation. My wife and I separated just over a year ago (my decision) and I moved back in with my parents while she stayed at our house. At her request (to give her time to ‘process’ me leaving) I did not begin official divorce proceedings until early this year. Ever since then progress has been frustratingly slow due, mainly, to my wife’s inaction and reluctance. She has since taken sole financial responsibility for our property (something my solicitor strongly suggested) and we have simply agreed to split the proceeds of it’s future sale 50/50.

Every time something needs to be done i.e. a form filled in, emails responded to she takes a great deal of time and has constantly maintained that, ultimately, she doesn’t want us to fully separate. Even the fact that I am now seeing someone else doesn’t seem to have made her accept reality. Eight months on and we are still going back and forth with my solicitor. The latest hurdle is that she is now questioning what we have agreed in principle financially due to me starting a new relationship as, if we were to live together, I would be better off with a second income. I simply cannot see an end to all of this and, even if there is one, I now have no idea what I might be left with if we ever sell the house. We have had one sale fall through there and no interest whatsoever in the last four months. I’m sorry to be rather gloomy but at least you know that you are not the only one in your situation, I suppose. 😔