What it says on the tin.....

Hi, I'm new here and hoping it will help me following my divorce and subsequently playing the role of non-resident parent to my eldest son, which I find particularly hard.

A little background......was with my ex husband for 10 years, had two children, and after 8 years of him being violent and emtionally abusive to me I finally found the strength to leave.

For the first 3 years we shared custody of the children, which is a major difficulty in itself. Suffered serious behaviour difficulties with eldest, totally unsupported by ex who actively encourages his bad behaviour, to the point my eldest now lives with his dad, whilst youngest still shares time equally between both homes.

On a happier note, I was very lucky to meet a wonderful man who I have subsequently married and couldn't be happier.

Miss my son terribly, and finding it very very difficult to cope with the situation and the feeling of loss. Would be interested to hear from any other parent in this situation and what hints and tips have helped them along the way.

Many thanks for getting this far

Hallo and welcome. I am so sorry to hear how you miss your son.

I had a neighbour who divorced and her eldest son stayed with her ex (mainly because Daddy promised to buy him a motorbike when he was 17!) so he is nearby with Dad and occasionally Dad's internet girlfriend from Eastern Europe, while his mum and younger brother have moved back up north.

My husband has made it very clear that he prefers his new woman's son 9 and daughter 5 to our own teenage sons. We've had some behaviour problems with elder boy who has now left school and theoretically looking for work. Every so often ex tries to harangue me about it.

Wish I had some helpful advice. I expect there are others on this site who share your experiences though and I hope they will post soon.