Separation

Hi- My husband and I have been separated for three years. He left me as I thought because he wanted a break. I was always optimistic he would comeback if I gave him that breathing space. We actually worked together but it never seemed a problem to me. We had our ups and downs like most couples, but we did or so I thought have the same views on most things.

He become very moody and quiet before I knew he was leaving which I might add came as a dreadful shock. I felt so ill and wretched and even now feel terrible some days.

Anyway it turned out the he went off with an old university girl friend he'd met forty years ago, who had got in touch with him on Friends Reunited .She had been married twice before. Having said that because I trusted him with my life I didn't find this out till a year later and even then I had to ask him if there was anyone else. You can imagine the horror and upset I felt and still feel.

Just so out of character for him. Theres lots of things hes done since then sly sneaky things I know I have to be strong and see a solicitor at some stage. We still run our business but from different offices. I had to work with him for a year before I could get out. So everything is still up in the air for now. Me I just take each day as it comes at the moment but know one day I will have to sort things out.

I am a strong person and could not go under although you think your not going to get through, but you do somehow. I have had and still have a lot of support from family and friends and last but not least our two wonderful children who have been very supportive more than.

Hi, welcome to Wiki! It is the place that none of us thought we would visit, but it is a great place for support, advice and friendship in the situations we find ourself in.

Your story is very familiar, especially the lies from the ex about 'being me' and 'needing space'. Our exs who go off and have these affairs do just not understand how much hurt they cause!

It is good that you have lots of support from family and friends.

Take care

S

Good to hear that you have support especially from your children. We do get through with the help of others to ease the way. I have only just realised how much I was deceived too, looking back. Good luck in sorting everything out.

that seems to be so common. a husband or wife asking for "time out" as an escape route, not realising or caring that they are making it worse for their partner.
glad you are a strong person and are making the best of things, not an easy thing to do and nobody seems to understand! friends and family tell you to just draw a line under it or similar, but have no idea how much we are going through emotionally.
keep talking to the peeps in the chatrooms and try to think positive! all the best, chris.

Hallo and welcome

"I need some space" means "I'm having an affair with someone else but I am too cowardly and dishonest to tell you".

It's not much comfort to know you are far from alone, but its true.

After being separated for 3 years I am sure you are aware you can divorce on the grounds that you have been separated for 2 years.

Hello. Thanks I didn't know that I'm biding my time at the moment...

Thanks for that...