hi

Hi, I've just registered. I don't know where to begin as I am totally ignorant about the subject. After 33 years together my husband just told me this afternoon that he is going to see a divorce lawyer next week. I've put a lot with this marriage from controlling to humiliation & then infidelity + many in between. I've always put up an appearance in front of friends & family for the sake of my children and the belief that our marriage is sacred as I been brought up. I am 46 I had a university degree but foolishly obeyed my husband wish & stayed at home to look after my family needs, as you can imagine I've no career, no money,no pension because I've never thought that my husband will abandon me someday. My older son 23 away at uni, next son 22 doing open Uni from home, daughter 20 away at Uni, youngest daughter 17 1/2 AS level, so I don't have young children. I don't know what is my situation and what are my entitlements can anyone help?.
thanks for your help.
sonbol63

You must be reeling from the shock.

Welcome to the site. I was with my huusband for 31 years, so its a major adjustment, but you will be fine.

I can't tell you what you are likely to get in a settlement, but you will be entitled to a reasonable amount after such a long marriage. Even when you are divorced your husband's national insurance contributions will count towards your state pension.

I am sure others will be able to reassure you more.

Keep posting.

Hi

Sorry to hear about your situation. I have a good idea of what you are going through and it is very difficult at first, but you will be able to get through it and start a new life.

You will be entitled to at least half of what is in the 'marital pot'. In order to get more help on a practical level as to what your entitlements may be please post more information:

Your respective ages;

The number of children you have and their ages;

How many nights the children spend with each parent;

The length of your marriage and any period of pre marriage cohabitation;

Your respective incomes;

Your respective outgoings;

Your assets - both soley held and joint;

Your liabilities.

At an emotional level you can this site to let of steam, get support and advice, make friends and generally make the divorce process easier.

All the best

S

Thank you Noregrets and itgetsbetter for your encouragement, today I was feeling awfully light headed sorry I couldn't reply straight away, here are more information for itgetsbetter:
-my age is46, husband is52 he started his pension 10 years late (final salary scheme)
-4 children,23-22-20-17.
-Me,husband,second son22 and daughter17 live in the same house, the other 2 at Uni.
-married 25years and engaged for 8 years before, so 33 years.
-his annual income £100.000+before tax. mine is nil apart from £70 monthly Child Benefit.
-outgoings roughly around £4500-£5000PM(mainly mortgage+Uni expenses)
-2 houses in joint names, one was main house but now let out worth around £400.000 mortgage £128.000.main house worth around £750.000 mortgage £550.00.
-older son23 got 2 more years to go at Uni, daughter20 another year to finish(she wants to do extra year on top). Next son22 open Uni from home another 12-18month, young daughter17 doing As so (A2 + 3-4) years at Uni.
What I wanted to ask about, do we really have to sell the houses if a formal divorce went through or could everything stays the same and do I have a right to stay at my current home.
definitely will seek the emotional help, could do with some friends as I can't tell anyone yet even my own family.