Hello

Hi there

My husband walked out on myself and our 2 young children (then 5 and 3) in Dec 2006 having kept going missing, not coming home after work and when i needed to go to work (he did shifts and mine worked around his) which now turns out that he was having extra-marital relations but that wasnt discovered by myself til almost 2 years after it had started. He constantly lies, has gone back on everything he agreed in mediation, even goes back on assurances he gives via his solicitor regarding contact, dumped me with massive debts and is now on a hate campaign with his new partner(actually the woman he had the affair with) and they threatened to lose me my job (I am a very hard working and well respected Foster Carer) they have since made false allegations that i harass them (in particular sitting outside their house for hours a day - like i ever have time or the inclination for that!!) and have threatened her in the local shop (despite her NEVER ever being in there the same time as me and i invited the police to check the CCTV to confirm this) and the latest thing is they have reported me to Social Services saying I treat my foster children better than my natural children which is a complete lie. I am wanting to pursue a case against them for slander as they have no evidence whatsoever about any of the accusations, and they are clearly attempting to lose me my job so as i will be forced to sell the marital home which i have maintained on my own since my husband left.

He gave me just 1 month, yes just 1!! with him continuing to pay the mortgage and bills and then i was on my own. That was the end of Dec 2006 and to this day, i have stood on my own 2 feet and done it all by myself and have dealt with every single sh*t storm they have reigned down on me. My children have always and will always be my motivation and providing for them is the most important aspect of my life. Contact with their father has been sporadic, cancelled at short notice, not constructive, and they have been promised so much that he has later welched on in favour of doing things with 'her' and 'her family' as an example, last year he promised them a camping trip in August, then at the end of August, they asked him why he hadnt even booked a day off to have with them and his excuse was 'mummy takes too much money off me i cant afford to' then the evil bloke he is, rang them to say good night the following week (which hardly ever happends) and said 'guess where i am, i;m on holiday in Egypt on a cruise down the Nile' with his partner !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How evil !

Because of my job, i cannot risk doing anything to get my own back for the extremely awful treatment they have dealt me and are still dealing me (the social services report was only last week)and quite frankly, i see any thing like that as a waste of my valuable time and will drag me down to their level which i refuse to do!

So, thats basically me! Any help with the false accusations would be appreciated if anyone has any ideas as my solicitor deals with family law i possibly need an alternative avenue to pursue the slander case against them

Regards

Kentgal x

Hi

I can understand where you are coming from on this, my situation is similar with the finances and work situation.

I too cannot do anything to get revenge as I would loose my job and the kids their home. I too am paying the lot alone. I have been arrested for alleged assault, I did nothing, thankfully not pursued. His solicitor accussed me of telling her she can't do her job, it was him.

My husband is a pervert who keeps getting away with it, tries to kill himself, can no longer work and its all my fault how can that be? Due to this I too had social services round to see if my children were high risk.

I don't know any answers, we just have to keep on going. I have him continually slandering me and as far as I know there isn't much you can do unless you have plenty of money. If I find any will let you know

Keep smiling - thats what I tell myself

Andrea

Kentgal

I don't think you ex is evil, just a selfish **** who puts his desires above everyone else's.

He will get his comeuppance I am sure one day.

I don't know anything about slander - except that I think it is civil and not criminal. I hope someone else on the site does know.

Anyway you can hold your head high knowing you've done your best and your children know it too, I am sure.

They have no proof of their allegations which are just pathetic - and officials won't want to have their time wasted in this way.

Good luck and keep posting.

Thanks for responses, i have struggled thru and worked hard to get where i am now, however, it bothered me that when the police came to interview me, although they were satisfied it was false allegations, they said that if i speak to them, see them or send a text and if they feel if in any way there is any malice or mickey taking being done, then the police will have to interview me under caution which will obviously go on my record (which is currently clear and proud of it!!) I cant believe that even though the purpotrators (sorry about the spelling if its wrong!!) have no evidence whatsoever, the police would pursue and even if its found that there is no case to be had, that will still go down on my Local Authority record which is really unfair.

But am smiling thru it all, have a wonderful new man in my life and am getting there, the stones in our shoes are merely blips that avoid us getting to where we want to in life, but the stones can easily be removed when the time is right.