After 28 years it's coming to an end or is it

I turn 55 this week and looks like my marrage is over.

My wife stopped letting me touch her after going through a ruff year. She lost both parents but had a little surgical enhancement with her inheritance late last year. Then the sex stopped and the touching stopped. She's told me she seeing counselor and that it is nothing to do with me. Well I don't buy it. She's also planning on some time alone and looking at moving out but not far. Now I've checked on some other things and yes she has extended some of her trips out of town. The thing that has me convinced she's now having an affair is her cell phone records. Lots of calls to/from one particular associate out of town. It wouldn't be suspicious but the time of day extends to weekends and past business hours. We've got young adult children and one is leaving for 6 months to teach abroad leaving us loaded up with furniture. We also had to do a refinance with all the college expenses etc. that accumulated. So right now I can't see making the final move for a year but this not touching is a lot worse than it sounds after 28 years. I've had issues with E.D. so like many I assume this started with the sex not working to well any more. I've read 75% of divorce is now the women leaving. I guess I'll be adding to the number.

Any advice on legal and things I should do other than get the house and debt in order? Any way to remove someone from a joint account without them knowing? I am opening a small back up account for myself but the credit cards have me a little concerned.

Going to be hard being this old and single.

From past experience. You can have the joint account frozen so neither of you can touch it,so withdraw what you have.

hclowns wrote:

Any way to remove someone from a joint account without them knowing? I am opening a small back up account for myself but the credit cards have me a little concerned.

The joint account is easy, just draw yourself a bank draft (if that's how they do it in the states) Keep hold of the draft until you are ready to place it back into a personal account of your own. I think they last for a year but again, I'm not too sure how it works over there.

As for the credit cards, draw cash on them and "max" them out.

Obviously the sh*t will hit the fan but at least the money will be in your control. You can always put the money back into the credit cards thereby reducing the debt back to a manageable level.

My own marriage ended 10 months ago when my husband moved out to live with another woman. We had been together 31 years.

I suppose you could say he left, but I had been asking him to leave for some time as I was unhappy with our relationship. I wouldn't leave without my children and couldn't afford to go anywhere with them.

It was a very sad time, but I am now much happier and feel I have a new lease on life as I am sure you will later on.

hclowns,

Its a tough place to be and individual to you...I hope you can stay focused.

Elle x

31 years. Surely the children must have been getting on. That's about the only fortunate thing I can say. My childeren are 22 and 26. Not exactly needed for mom and dad. I'm just not as torn up as I thought I'd be.

Hclowns,

We all deal with sep n div in different ways, I wish you well

Elle x