Seeking people in similar situation

Hi. I'm hoping to make contact with others who have asked for a divorce after many years of marriage. I feel sure it's the right thing for me to do, but I'm still scared of the future and feel tremendously guilty sometimes.

Hi there,

Dont be scared of the future. I know I say that now but i really did have my regrets that what when I asked my stbx to leave was the right decision. I was together for over 18 years and married for 14 of them. I just felt like we had grown apart, no longer had anything to keep us together. I know people stay together for the sake of the children but I knew I couldnt be that person. Im only in my thirties and didnt want to carry on with the same routine every day. I was kidding myself and my friends that things were ok and that everything will be alright, but knew deep done they wernt.

Finally told him over breakfast one morning and he left that day. We agreed that the marriage had ran it course and that was it. I try to make the kids understand that they are still loved very much by everyone. It has been hard for them and especially when the inlaws have had a few things to say, which have prevented me and my stbx to have a "uncomplicated spilt".

A year and a bit on and Im soo much happier, I no longer have to pretend to be that person. I no longer regret my decision as I have already met someone who is my absolute rock. Holds me up when things are complicated or I have a bad day. The kids still see their dad as I think that is very important. I just wish to inlaws would stay out of it but hey cant have everything plain sailing.

Just take every day as it come and chin up, the future is a very scary thing but stay strong. All the best Xxx

Hi akanicole,

I didnt ask for a divorce - it was the other way round - after 22 years together.

Like you, I was scared of what the future would bring ............. but you know what?

I am SOOOOO glad that this has happened to me. The first 6 months was awful - but now I am stronger, happier and my OWN person - not somebody else's dog's body, to be abused (mentally), for once I am able to decide for myself, and I am a much nicer person (unfortunately my exh still remains as self-centred now as when we were married).

I too have met somebody who makes me laugh and loves me for me.

Best of luck whatever you decide.