Hello

Hi, I have joined today because I received an email from x saying that he has lodged the papers for the absolute.
I feel dreadful that it has finally happened. He moved out last year saying he just wanted to be single again after 23 years, 3 children and a 50th birthday.
All our joint couple friends have dropped me (think they are embarrassed and somehow I am infectious).
So if anyone has advice for a rather bitter and twisted person, starting life again, I would be grateful!
It is a bad day today- i am not always miserable but someetimes it all seems very dreary.

HI moon shadow,

you don't sound bitter or twisted to me. Of course you are feeling hurt that your stbx has pushed to complete the divorce. You have a lot of history together. Its a pretty poor show that mutual friends have dropped you, though, as you say, they may simply not know what to say. However, you will make new friends of your own, who will be loyal to you.
It sometimes takes years to get over the more vibrant feelings of distress that go with a divorce, but they do fade gradually, and little by little you will stop reacting badly to all the usual triggers that remind you of your previous life.
Dont pressurise yourself to feel " recovered " asap- rather consider that you will try every day to build a future for yourself, piece by piece. Make your own decisions, decide what you want to do in the future, join some clubs or classes- do whatever it takes to move on a little.
You will feel better soon, not all in one go, but in patches that gradually grow longer.
Good Luck!

Hi Moon

Welcome to wiki though sorry you find yourself here. Heres a wiki hug for you ((((((Moonshadow))))).

I thought at first that people were avoiding me or ignoring me. They dont know how to react so they say nothing. One friend said to me they are also thinking that could be me. Hold your head high Moon and look them straight in the eye.

We all have bad days its like a roller coaster but as time goes on the ups outweigh the downs. We are all here for you, we have all been where you are or where you have been and we understand. So blog, post or pop into chat for a hummmm chat!

Take care

Marsa
xx