Not as alone as I thought I was....

Quick recap
* Was married 12 yrs / 4 lovely children / aged 11,9,8,6
* Moved out FMH almost 2 yrs ago / discovered wife having affair for over a yr prev / Decree Nisi Jan 09
* 1st court hearing for finances next month (13 July) / getting nervous ahead of that as am representing myself

Biggest worry is the children's wellbeing / their education / money ...in that order

Ex moved in partner to FMH 1 yr ago (but still denying co-habitation) / kids are caught in the middle as sworn to secrecy but don't want to be disloyal to either side

Ex stone-walling on all financial issues / basically wants same standard of living to be paid for by myself, but for her new partner as well (who she isn't admitting to !)

Have endured a pretty horendous past 20 months, but am hoping that there is light at the end of the tunnel with the Financial Hearings....or am I being unduly optimistic ?!

Hello, Welcome to Wiki. No one is ever alone here, we are a bit like the Cheers bar, only open 24/7 .

The financial proceedings will bring some finality, but they are not easy to get through, especially if one side is not playing ball. Keep posting, and the guys will continue to help you as far as they can. Have a good mooch in the library - there are tons of resources in there for self reppers.

Amanda

Hi Strings,

I'm new to the forum but your situation has aspects that are similar to my own.

Good luck with the court hearing and your priorities are spot on regarding your children.

I can't comment on whether you are being unduly optimistic or not because I didn't have to go through that personally. You should at least go to court with a positive attitude and make your case for what you believe is the most appropraite outcome for your children and yourself - If the children live with your ex then when they come to stay, you should at least be entitled to offer them a comfortable home.

However it concludes you will be better in the long run for having put it behind you and will then be able to focus on the future.

Good luck for the 13th.
Yoda