Introducinng myself

Hi, I'm new to the forum. I had been married for 34 years when I discovered my husband was yet again in huge debt- hadn't told me and was paying the debts fromn the joint account to whic only I contributed. Now waitting to hear how much the divorce process will take from me. Cross, sometimes, feeling bitter and hating ir and myself for it. I guess you have all been there

Hi gnomelady

Welcome to the site none of us wanted to be on, but thank goodness (and Ian) that its here!

I was with my husband 31 years. I've been separated a year, doing really well, but crying my eyes out this evening because I heard a certain love song.

It sucks, but on Wikivorce you are with peeps who understand. Do pop into chat and come along to a Wikievent if you can, they are a great way to meet supportive, lovely folk.

Nell

Thanks, Nell. I read about this site in a magazine and have been looking aat it for a while. Everyone seems friendly so I thought I would take the plunge. I have my Decree Nisi but exis dragging his feet about disclosure and I am not sure what to do. Do I press it or leave it? Would be grateful for advice

Hello and welcome to wiki

Your not alone anymore and you will get lots of advise and support on here.

If your asking should you press him for his disclosures i think you wont have much choice.

My ex left for ow 3 years ago and my ex is always dragging his heels,just be careful if your using a sols as this can be their game to run you out of money.Its cost me a fortune!My advice would be try to get your sols to be firm in his letters and where poss give time scales for replies.

I wish you luck x

muchtoomuch xx

Hi and welcome to Wiki

When you have started down the divorce road the best thing is to try and finish it as quickly as possible and get then financial disclosure sorted out. There are sometimes reasons to delay, such as providing stability for children at crucial times. Dragging it out takes it's toll both emotionally and financially.

All the best

S

Hello Lady are you trying to agree this without court?

If not have you filed form A with court (application for ancillary relief) if not think about it, once filed the process of sorting the finances out becomes more formal with a judge setting a time table for exchange of form E and other information.

Hi- probably should have made the position clearer. I was much the higher earner. He ran up huge debts unbeknown to me and being paid for from our joint account. Any settlement will lose me money and he has the debts as there are in his name. He certainly didn't spend the money on the family. Despite earning the major salary, I had to plead for new clothes and things for the house and seldom got them. He moved out after I paid him to on sol's advice and has not contributed a penny towards the house since. I have even found calculations which look like he was working out what my death in harness benefits would be. He has allegedly applied for a CEV on his pension but it has not yet come. I paid the fee for him to do it. We are no longer speaking. It is easier that way. But this has been going on since March and I don't want to remind my sol as he hasn't got one and all the costs come down on me