Unexpectedly here

Hi

my partner of 10 years announced out of the blue last week that he wasn't happy- his sloution? To walk out on me and 3 kids (15, 12+4)

I was married before I met him but that split was different- we both really wanted it and there were no broken hearts.

I am emotionally all over the place ATM, upbeat and empowered one minute and all snot and tears the next.

We have a house together so loads to sort out but I'm concentrating on getting over the hurt.

One week on I feel under pressure (mostly internal) to be "fine" but am often taken by surprise by feelings of panic and anxiety.

Looking forward to getting some support.

xxx

Welcome to wikivorce FlamingKitty (((((hugs))))) . Take the pressure off and give yourself time, it's ok to feel the way you feel. It's going to be a rollercoaster and wikipeeps will be here to help, many of us have been through the same. Take care.

Hello and welcome to Wiki.
Sending you hugs x

Hi flamingKaty

Welcome to Wiki - Im sorry you have a need to be here though.

There is a wealth of advice, support, information and help to be found here - we will help in anyway we can.

My ex partner (also of around 9/10 years) did exactly the same - although it was me who had said that things were difficult and we needed to talk, he was gone within the hour , I often wondered if he had been looking for an "escape" route.

Any relationship that breaks down after that amount of time together takes time to recover from, to heal and sift through the maze of emotions you will experience - we know only too well how it feels, so keep posting, whatever the subject matter, and know that you are not alone.

Ruby

Poor Katy
It is so hard - isn't it especially with 3 children - mine are 12, 9 and 5.

you will hear many people talk about the rollercoaster - up one minute down the next - but it is so true. don't pressurise yourself to feel "fine" - I am 15 months down the line and still prepared to give myself a little longer. Take care of yourself and your kids and treat all 3 of you when you can - xfactor, wine and popcorn works very well for us!

(((((((Hugs))))))) Wee Kate

You wil still be in shock at the moment and concentrate on looking after yourself and the kids. As others have said your emotions will be up and down for a long time. we are all different and find our own ways to cope.
I have achieved a lot in the 2 years I have been separated but I still get down at times. It is hard work but it does get better.
take care

Thanks everyone, I tried to thank you all but this site is being all strict and pernickity!

I'm afraid I'm doing my usual of late and drinking wine, figure its ok to have a crutch for a while and i have plenty people watching to ensure it doesn't become my everything!

Had an OK day today but keep having

"OH my god, I'm never going to......." moments. and its usually about intimacy and affection.

I haven't had a cuddle in so long and thats hard to bear.

Katy
xxx