coming to an agreement

Hi I am new to this site.It is as if it is never ending when you try to reach an agreement on finances. No one wants to back down.

Hello mjnow

I know it must seem like that is the case but thankfully only about 3% of financial matters end up at a final hearing for the court to decide the outcome.

If you need any help or have any questions please post them up so us lot can try and help

Hi mjnow,

Hoping that you get it resolved so that you can move on.

What worries me is that all this stuff can drag on way past the divorce!

Good Luck

Hi, thanks for that. I have my Decree Nisi which will be 2 years come May. Cannot go to Absolute because we can't agree on finances. When you know that you are not in the wrong you have a feeling of wanting to make them pay especially after 35 years of marriage.

yes, it is nearly 2 years since the decree Nisi and still it goes on. Thanks anyway.

could both parties sit down in a room with your solicitors and thrash it out?

Solicitors do encourage round table meetings to discuss issues and try and resolve them and in an ideal world that's what we would all do, resulting in many solicitors and barristers stacking shelves in Tesco's

The fact is there are often many issues not relating to the financial side that seep in to the negotiations throwing a spanner in the works, it only takes one spouse who feels hurt/cheated/abandoned for communication to breakdown completely and before you know it you only communicate via a solicitor and ultimately your sat before a judge who is deciding who gets what from an asset pot that may have taken the two of you most of your adult life to build, the judge doesn't care who left who, who behaved badly what kind of people you are, they only care who should get what.

Righteous indignation and Ancillary Relief don`t mix it just costs much more.

Perhaps there should be some counselling before court to try and explain that the marriage is over, that part of life's journey is at an end, time to start again.....life goes on as they say and the best way to start that new life is not with no money and a bitter heart and a bag full of regret.

Ramble over time to fire up the microwave