The son, the mediator.

Hi, I'm just looking for some information on financial settlement in a divorce.

My parents separated about 2 years ago, no official divorce yet, and now my dad wants an end to arguments regarding who got what. I'm the level headed one in the family so I'm in a bit of a mediator position, which I don't mind for the moment. If I can save them legal costs that's a good thing.

What I would like to know is:

Is it important that they legally divorce?

The relationship is well and truly over, each has a romantic interest in another country.

What is the best way to negotiate for household property?

There is very little of any monetary value, just things each needs or wants.

What would be the likely outcome in a legal contest given the following details?

Married for around 30 years. No large assets brought into the marriage.
Father consistently made more money, including owning a company as well as
a few medium-sized windfalls from TV commercials.
Mother did more than half of the parental responsibilities, but definitely not all.
during a 2 year period a $30,000 debt was accrued.
Mother asked to split bank accounts.
Mother started an extra-marital relationship and visited the new man overseas with money she had received from a sizable court settlement in regards to an issue from before the marriage.
Mother left the family home to live between a friend's house and her lover's.
All children are over 18 at this point.
Father worked to pay off all remaining debt.

Mother has very little of the communal property (no savings or property exist), except some antiques she brought into the marriage and some she inherited while married.
Father has most of the family property, but much went to the 3 adult children.
Mother is set to receive a large inheritance in the next few years.

Sorry for such a long message but any help would be appreciated. For the record, all relationships in the family are good aside from the "who got what" dispute.

Thank you.

Hi. I cant answer all your questions as Australian law is different to UK law. But I will have a pop at the headings as best I can.

It is very important that they divorce. For all kinds of legal and emotional reasons. Usualy married people are contractualy bound to each other in regards to finance. And financial matters cannot be fully settled whilst they are still married. In theory the still have a call on each other in respect of finances.

Its very dificult to move on emotionaly if you are still married to an estranged husband or wife. That bond still exists. Breaking that bond can help us to finaly draw a line under the relationship.

In the Uk its considered not worth dividing up household items. The legal cost of this is not worth the replacement of the items. However, treasured belongings are often hotly fought over. Its always best (and less costly) to negotiate directly over treasured items.

In the UK the starting point for division of assets is 50 / 50. The Parent with care usaly gets more that 50% however.

All assets are thrown in the pot and the debts are payed out of that pot. The remainder is divided up. However, in the UK any debt accrued after a split is considered owned by that person. But not always. What has to be considered with any legal action is the cost of that action against the debt. It may transpire that recovering say 10,000 may cost 10,000. Therefore you have to always watch the cost to get what you want. Usualy legal fees are significant factor in division of assets.

Any future inheritance has to be taken into account.
I hope I have answered some of your questions. It would be best to seek some local legal advice. C.