hello and some questions

Hi all

I left my wife 4 months ago for another woman.
Think what you wish, I have NO regrets!

How can I move things on divorce wise? Initially my wife was wanting to divorce me on grounds of adultery, but sadly she has cooled off a bit on wanting to do that. I certainly cant be bothered waiting for 2 years for her to maybe decide she wont agree to divorce. We have 2 kids and she is being arsy about access, so am hoping a legal divorce might help with that.

I see you can apply for divorce on grounds of unreasonable behaviour, but I dont understand how you can prove any of it if it goes on behind closed doors. I imagine she would contest it if i used those grounds anyway.

Is it possible to apply for divorce on the grounds of my own adultery? I live with my new partner so surely that is proof that things have broken down irretrievably?

finally if she comes round to the idea, whats the best way to divorce by mutual agreement? go with the adultery thing? lie about being apart for more than 2 years? come up with unreasonable behaviour on both sides?

any advice would be appreciated!

Franky,
Four months is not a lot of time for emotions to settle down. The last thing that you want to do is to get into a situation where she is jamming spanners in the works, or defending the divorce.

Time is a great healer. But that said, without knowing the details or circumstances it is impossible to say what you wife may find palatable.

Up to two years separated, the choice is unreasonable behaviour or adultery. You cannot divorce on the grounds of your own adultery.

You could divorce your wife on the grounds of her unreasonable behaviour, but there must be examples of unreasonable behaviour within the last six months. Given that you have left for four months, your clock is seriously ticking.

See this link and read it through:

www.wikivorce.com/divorce/Divorce-Forum/...l-needed-for-UB.html

Tread very carefully as the UB reasons given can be the spanner that your wife throws into the works to stop things moving. Better to achieve a consensual solution.

Failing the above, the alternative is that your wife divorces you for adultery or unreasonable behaviour, or you wait the two years and go for a 2 year no-fault divorce. If she still won't agree, then it it is five years without consent.

Mike