supporting role

My partner is in the traumatic process of divorcing his alcoholic wife and I am trying to support him . I was nearly in the same position myself 3 years ago but my husand died due to alcohol related disease . I have been a nurse for over 30 years and I have to admit it was the worse death I have ever witnessed made worse because my children , who were teenagers at the time, were also present.
Living with an alcoholic is destructive but watching them die is hell . The guilt that goes through your mind knowing that for years you wished them were dead leaves a lasting impression . Of course not all alcohloics will end up like this and the torture may continue for many many years .
If you are married to an alcoholic and wondering if divorce is right - it is .
It doesn't get any better and when it is over you need to be very gentle with yourself.
Only someone who also lives or has lived with an alcoholic will understand what you are going through so don't expect the courts to understand . It is you that has to live with the lies of having to make excuses for the bruises , debts and lack of friends - you cant invite people round when there is someone in a stupour on the sofa !
There is a light at the end of the tunnel and I have been very lucky .