New to wikivorce

Hi Everyone,
I am new to the site and a little nervous-although I want to find some friends and support. I have been married for 24 years- should have been 25 this year. I have been separated for 3 months although problems for 6 months. My story is like a lot of others where husband said he was 'unhappy' which led me to having anxiety and depression as i couldn't make him happy and felt at fault. Noticed his behaviour different and withdrew from me. He left telling everyone i threw him out- i asked him to leave if he didn't love me. Found out seeing another woman-a work colleague. I'm heartbroken and so lonely. He won't admit it. Says he doesn't want a divorce as he doesn't believe in it and that he will always provide for me (how generous). Have finally sought leagal advice and have grounds for divorce. I'm just so afraid to file for divorce and let go-although I am virtually living a divorced life as he has very little contact with me except some texts and the odd phone call. is this usual? PK

Hi Pat

welcome to Wiki - no need to be nervous, you are amongst friends here, and we will do all that we can to support, help and advise you.

You say that your husband doesnt want a divorce, as he doesnt believe in them - what about what you want and need? It sounds as though it time to put yourself first and concentrate on your needs and feelings. In your post you say that he is seeing another woman, cake and eating it prehaps?

Divorce is frightening, there's no doubt about that, and by coming here, you have found yourself in a good place. All of us are either going through divorce/separation or are already divorced, we all have our own story, and Im sure that someone will read your post and see themselves in your words. You are not alone anymore.

Take care

Ruby xx

Hi Pat

Welcome also new here myself there's nothing wrong with you he has the problem so don't beat yourself up.I agree with pat you must do what is right for you.


Regards

Pat, welcome to wiki,

don't be afraid - come into the chat room - its only a little step and everyone will make you welcome.
And don't be put off by the familiarity - many of us are only a few weeks in front of you.

dadsrus

Hi Pat and welcome to Wiki. Your story is virtually identical to mine. Mine had an affair with a work colleague too You've come to the right place for support with whatever you want to do. You're not alone now. xx

Hi Pat

Welcome, and as dylan says you are not the one at fault, and one thing is for sure, the further we go down the road, the easier it becomes. Keep plodding.

Joy xx

Thank you Ruby x