Help

I have been married for 17 years and have been unhappy for the last few years. We have 3 beautiful children and our fighting is definately affecting them my son has aspergers!
I dont know where to start, we both work fulltime, I work days my husbadn nights and all our money is in a joint account that he controls. He has even taken the childrens money and put it in his account. He left me at a cricket festival by southgate as he was drunk and it took me 3 hours to find my way home as i havent used public transport for years! He does not hit me it is all mental torture swearing calling me names and completely undermining me infront of the children. I have stayed with him as we would loose the house, car, everything and I wouldnt be able to work as childcare in london for 3 kids is too much! Has anyone any advice I don't know where to start. He refuses to move out of the house.

Take a deep breath, see a solicitor and look into your options. You would have the right to stay in the house if the children are to stay with you. Depending on your earnings, there is a childcare element in Working Parents Tax credits. If you children are of school age, after-school clubs are good and not extortionately expensive, though whether this would work for your child with Asperger's syndrome would depend on the child and the club. You would be entitled to child support through the CSA and half the money in the account he controls. Living the way you are is just not worth it for financial comfort, particularly if your comfort is entirely at the mercy of his grace and favour.

Sadie

Thanks. My only option as I have one child 2 one 9 and on 13 is to move out of london.My mum lives in Devon and with half of our house i could get a 4 bed house but im dreading telling her as she always hated him as he was the wrong colour! If i stayed in london id have to give up work but if i moved to devon my mum could help with childcare. Im dreading telling my son my daughter blames me as she says i moan alot! I wouldnt have to if I was happy