4 Kids, 11 years and now she don't love me

Hi

I am 15 days into a new life; a life I did not see comming. LAst week I was a total wreck and I really do not know who the person I called my wife is anymore. I have had lots of tears, with friends, and am currently existing in a surreal state but am back functioning and back at work.

To be told simply that she does not love me anymore and being asked to find somewhere so "she can have space" was a major blow. I returned after a couple of days as it is my house, they are my kids and my whole self revolves around that location as a result.

Going back was a shock to her as she seems to want to get me out of her life a quickly as poss.

As it is most definatley over I am getting some free first consults with solicitors butr eally do ot want to go down that route. I am having the house valued so that I can know the financial options. I have tried to get her to agree to mediation so we can get agreements on important stuff, (kids, House, Money, Future comeback),put together - but no go there though. She doesn't want to spend any money but simply now wants me to buy her out of the house.

Anyway I am hoping someone here can help. As mediatiotn is out of the questions and getting lawyer to do everything is out of my/our budget I want to explore the Separation Agreement route.

Does anyone know where I can get a free proforma of one from? A colleague at work got one 2 years ago but does not have it anymore and cannot remember where he got it from.

help! as I feel I can't take the next step until we can get a signed agreement and pass it under the nose of a Lawyer, (rather than them do the whole thing).

Finaly I have no life outside of my family. I gave it up 13 yesr ago and this place looks like it might prove helpful in that area. Share some of your experiences with me. I am not going to jump staright in but I need to start thinking postive about the future.

Hi there

Cant help with where to get the pro forma separation agreement, sorry, but I can tell you that you need to do a little more than pass it under the nose of a lawyer.

If you both do not have independent advice on it then it is not necessarily binding, and a court can refuse to uphold it should you or her later decide you want a bigger slice of the pie.

As for wiki itself...it is a great place, but one word of warning - you need quite some stamina to keep up with this lot when they are out and about .

Amanda

Amanda
Thanx for the response.

If passing it under the nose of both Lawyers, (if she ever gets one), is not binding then how do I make it binding? She does not want to spend any money - not that either of us has any at the mo.

I'm looking forward to the comms from anyone about any of this stuff.

What does 'Administrator has diabled public write access' mean. Do I need to be doing anything different.

Hi Dabot,

Amanda isn't around for a bit.

Personally I can't help you re separation, I know nothing about it. I hope someone else will take this up.

The Administrator bit usually means you haven't logged on, clearly you have because otherwise you wouldn't have been able to post, so that message should have disappeared totally.

YA

Young Again

Thank you for responding. I am looking for any way to keep my costs to a minimum and still cover me against her coming back for more. I'm not exactly loaded and the future looks even poorer with a doubled sized mortgage and reduced household income due to her leaving.

Which she now says she wants to be out by the end of August so she can rent her mates out house acroos the road. At least the kids will be close -so long as I can keep hold of this house.