Im so sad

Hi all, This is my first post.

My Husband of 7 years went to work one day two weeks ago and never came home. for the first few days he would not even speak to me, now he will speak but only as and when he wants.He has left once before about a year ago but came back after 3 months, promising me he would never do it again to me or kids WHAT A LIAR! We have 3 young kids, they have been crying for him at night, especially our 4 year old son who is very close to him but he does not seem to care! He makes me so ANGRY, i could scream!

I just feel such a fool for having put up with this violent (thats another story),grumpy,selfish, horrible man for him to do this to me and kids, and i am so cross with myself that I cannot help but love him even now.

He has said he is definatley not coming back and I know i cannot have him back this time, but I feel so sad, I just cry every night.

anyway enough for now, just writing this has made me feel a bit better, just wanted to say hello. xx

Welcome to wiki!

I'm so sorry for what you are going through - it's a tough time. I'm almost a year down the line from something similar and it hasnt been easy, and still isnt. It's really only just recently that I have finally let go and accepted what has been happening.

Try to stay strong, and keep posting as you will get lots of help and support here.

x

Hi

This is so hard for you with such young children as well. If he has done this before then he is clearly not in control of his emotions and as hard as it is (I talk from experience here!) try to have as little contact with him as possible for the sake of your own emotional wellbeing. I made the mistake of keeping in contact with my husband, I think, hoping that he would come to his senses but I have finally realised all it does is hurt me and allow him to make me feel even less worthwhile than he already has.

I have found this site such a help and there are some wonderful people on here and when you receive a pm from someone who you know is taking an interest in what you're going through and can offer their opinions it can be a tremendous help and source of comfort.

The tears are normal and we all have them - as everyone on here has told me 'be kind to yourself and look after you'. That way you can help your children as well. He will be the loser in the end.

(((((((((((Big Hugs))))))))


Linda

Thank you for your replies,

Just knowing there are people out there that have had the same feelings is a great comfort.

I know there is no going back this time and I have my first appointment with a solicitor next Tues.

I just can't believe he is being so angry and spiteful when he is the one that has left!

He has already said he wants half the equity in the house (£30,000) so that he can have a deposit for a new house, but I am not in a position to be able to get a mortgage needed to buy him out or even take on the curent mortgage in just my name (£110,000). I can however manage the current payments on my own (its in joint names)

There are just so many things to think about, I find it overwhelming.

Thanks again

stressstressstress

(((((stressstressstress))))

So sorry to hear your post.Try and keep strong,I know it is so hard not to cry.
Will be thinking of you.
Love Cl xx

Hi welcome to Wiki

Partners can be so bloody minded at times STBXs (soon to be Xs) cause us grief in so many ways when the realisation of the partner they left is moving on without them sinks in. What anger you see now can grow beyond proportions specialy when its realised what the finanaces will be. so prep your self for the suprises, Twists and accusations.

Dont worry about the house if you go down the road of divorce then you will find that the courts probably will not tell you and the kids to leave the property or to sell the house, (what ever do not leave the property you are in a stonger footing by being in it)Hubby may find that he will have to wait for any share in the property untill the kids are grown up.